It is not the rarity that two people spend many years together, and then they just end separated. They will explain this as boredom or routine. They got tired from each other, from daily conflicts, from the same unsolved problems, and the final decision was separation.
If someone says “they did not love each other enough”, that is a big mistake. Sometimes, love is not enough to keep a couple together. Famous tennis player Goran Ivanišević and his wife Tatjana spent many years together, they have two children but yet they are divorced. He was cheating her with model Vanja, later Tatjana found another man and they simply concluded that marriage has no sense anymore. They are now in communication because of children, because they wish to act like mature, adult people. Recently Tatjana gave birth to another child, with her present partner Vlaho. Goran was there to give her support. They are an example of modern family.
What is the meaning of past relations? Should we really burn every bridge, or we need kind of connection with our past memories?
How to fit our past experience into our present life?
You must take the limit. There is a line which should never be crossed. There is no need for fights, crying, revenge.
If you have children with your ex-wife you will visit her because of this. It can’t be an excuse for random sex.
You have unsolved financial debts, you need to go on the court because of alimony? This is an obligation and your present partner should not take this as a reason for argument.
You and ex-partner have common friends. No, you can’t turn head on the street when you see your ex-wife’s brother, because you were good with him for years. He is still your friend, even she is not your wife anymore. Also, if you had good relation with her parents, you will not pretend that they don’t exist anymore.
You and your ex-partner still work together, in the same firm. Well, someone should be fired or someone should leave this job? As we know, the job is not something that you change overnight, so there you need patience.
Your ex-partner lives in the neighborhood. Well, you can’t hit him or her with stone, because they are at the same address as before.
There are many situations which will connect us with our ex-lovers, even we are aware of this. Destiny will play some cruel games and it will be unpleasant. You can’t kill your ex because he is still alive. Maybe, it will be good that you can make him vanish, to avoid problems with your new partner.
Past relation is burden or memory, depends on which side you wish to see. You can make things more easy for yourself if you understand this as an obligation. Do you need to see ex-wife? This is the same as you must visit the dentist. Painful, unpleasant, but necessary. Or, you wish to prolong your pain and avoid this forever? A story about your ex-partner is maybe without end, but you keep this as a reminder, how to avoid mistakes in your new relationship.