relations

Unfriended, deleted, blocked

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Once when you are connected with someone as friend you share everything. Tears, laugh, joy, sadness. You are confident, many secrets stay hidden and relation develops as kind of blood connection. Having a friend is a treasure, loss of friend is damage.

Technology surprised us with new phenomenon called virtual friends. As much internet separates people because we stare in our gadgets more than we should do, also internet connect people from different part of the world, in the way how we never imagine. Indeed, i would never met people from Turkey, Thailand , India and other countries without internet. That places i never visited in real life and maybe i will never see, but thanks to that people i feel their culture and i share their mood with them every day. We trade photos, opinions, conversations and enjoy in our differences and experiences.

When you break contact with friend in reality, you will turn your head on the street. You will not say hello. Maybe you hear gossip later. Maybe friend try to make revenge, to make you humiliated because you hurt him.

In virtual life, once when you use block option, this person vanish. Person is dead, like it never existed. Some kind of people will try new approach and make new profile, they will try to seek you on other social networks, but with time they will give up.

What stays as question is why people break friendships in virtual world, what kind of reasons are the most often?

This i will try to answer accord my experiences.

Women:

Interest for same guy in internet will break friendship, especially if guy sits on both chairs.

Rude comments on photos.

Call each other fat or overweight.

Talking bad about kids, boyfriends or husbands from friend’s side.

Spamming inbox or tagging without limits.

Unwanted advices and busybodies.

Men: 

If you are gay and you contact guy who is straight.

Interest for the same girl.

Different political beliefs and religious status.

Make their manhood under question.

Discovering friend is fake.

Too much talk and trolling.

As i say we are from other cultures, if you have multicultural page (as mine for example), we should be careful what is finding as insult in which country. In general on my first line are annoying people and spammers. Then in second line are perverts (which are also annoying so it comes in first line too) and busybodies.

Shall we offer explanation before we use delete button? Well, if we warned person few times about their actions, then not. I am always for alert at first. Before i close the door i wish to show person where the door are. I use nice apology when i disagree and rough approach when person doesn’t hear me.

What is advantage in this virtual friendship? There are lot of fish in the sea. You might give second chance but don’t waste too much time. Always here are new people who would appreciate you more.

Also if you get such reaction: “You are hurting me by disagreeing with me. ” you know you are on the right way. Mature person will not act as hurt just because opinions are different.

If you get love offer from a guy , as i got “be mine or i will block you”, also close the door. Blocked options invented smart guy who knew how far humans can go.

 

business · career · character · crises · depression · destiny · freedom · money · relations

How success spoils people?

 

Imagine that your life suddenly change over night. You might get rich. Nothing makes person so poisoned and gloomy as success. Drink this sweet champagne and enjoy in taste, you are privileged person. 

Yesterday you were poor, today you are  rich, and how to be flexible with this change?

 

The moment you started to be famous and rich, main questions will be:

Who is your real friend now?

Who are your enemies?

How to treat people who loves you, and how to deal with others who hate you?

How to treat new people in your life, as potential friends or rivals?

Where you will invest your money?

 

You will need backup with many ingredients. Honesty, truth, loyalty, don’t forget real values when shinny stars are all over you. Maybe you are role model for others, but be able to look yourself in the mirror and don’t lose your roots and your identity.

Justin Bieber is still so young, but press talk about his behavior . He was in brothel and did not pay to prostitutes, he spit on flag in Argentina, and he said to his fan girl that she looks like whale. Handsome guy with sweet voice, and now he needs to prove who is the boss?

In Wild West boss was sheriff with gun who was shooting to make an order. It was necessary because drunk cowboys who played poker were dangerous, and sheriff made discipline on hard way. Nowadays, we have stage and glamour, and gun is no more dress for success. Famous person is not on all points bulletin . Wanted dead or alive for his or her head? No, we want to see our idols in their best edition. Also this is lesson for crowd, girls are running and crying for Bieber, but be careful if you are size 44, because he will invite you to show The biggest loser. 

We can forgive to Bieber because who knows what we should do on his place, with his ages and his money. 

On social networks we could saw bigger stars than Bieber is. 

The other part of this story are provincial people. They could be cocky jerks and narcissists. Local guy opened his own fitness center and his profession  is a kick boxer. He created profile on social network and all women became crazy for him. He uses his popularity to drag naive girls into his bed and later he doesn’t know their names. He enjoys in attention, and if you ask any favor from him, you will not get it. He is here to collect attention and admiration, not to give something for return. If you say something opposite to him, you are jealous, envious and frustrated. You don’t want sex with him? For sure you are lesbian. Don’t forget to tell him every day how sexy is his body and how strong are his muscles. He has dress for success, oiled muscles and firm body, and you are here as his dog on the chain.

Don’t bark too much, just sit and wait for your bones. You might choose, be a slave and follower or just say no and leave . You might be poor and without money, but your personal freedom has no price.

behavior · control · drama · ego · life · psychology · relations

Man from the cave

 

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Once upon a time there was man in the cave. His duty was to feed his family, to make fire and to defend his woman from beasts. He was strong and tough, and all were afraid of him. Despite of fear,  they felt safe in his presence.

During centuries things changed, technology give us much opportunities to make fire alone, guns replaced stones and beasts escaped in the forest. But one thing is the same, women like to feel protected and safe.

Why we loved Marlon Brando as Stanley Kowalski, even his behavior reminds on monkey in the cage? This testosterone’s attack makes him sexy. Ladies, did you imagine yourself on the desk with him?

Clint Eastwood was savage policeman but we all loved Dirty Harry. As we love Schwarzenneger and Stallone and Jean Claude van Damme, with him we could walk on the street without fear.

So, guess who will be the guy who will have earlier sex experiences? Nasty guy with too loud motorcycle , who run away from school. Wild guy with black eye . The rebel who fight with teacher and headmaster. 

Nowadays women earn money and they can take care of own future. But still is hard for woman to live alone in flat, because she is target for every maniac. It is hard for her to progress at work if man doesn’t stand behind her back. Also, imagine yourself in nightclub alone, how to get rid of drunk admirer who doesn’t want to leave you in peace and who stalks every your step.

Our mothers will recommend us to associate with guy from nice family, who graduated with excellent marks and who will continue family business. Yes, he has key of future. If he is a man.

What that means? A long time ago Sylvia went to nightclub with her boyfriend Steve. It was crowd and guy spill beer on her shirt. Steve start to talk with that guy and he sent him to hell , and Steve apologize to him, not to her. She was so disappointed. Guy who spill beer was big and with earring on nose, but still Steve was pussy, he even hugged him. At the end Sylvia told to guy that he is an asshole, and he did not dare to hit her. She felt more as man than Steve. He was just immature kid in this situation, who afraid of stronger dude.

So, got the point? If we have man who will beg and cry more than women, we feel something is wrong. 


Where is that man from the cave? 

We don’t ask that man must have bomb to destroy all around us. His  strong attitude is sexy and useful. Woman will feel that she can lean on him. 

Next time when you don’t stand up for your lady don’t be surprised if she walks out with someone else who has bigger guts.

cyber · cyber space · depression · destiny · drama · dreams · egoism · flirt · relations

Virtual narcissist – true story

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Every new person in our life is field of risk. Are you opened to new acquaintances, and you are the one who easy open doors to person in virtual world? It could be great act of empathy, but this kind of decisions are not always clever. If person is from another country and depends to another system of values, risk is even bigger. You never know with whom you are dealing with.

Love is one of areas where we are the weakest. One sweet smile, hot look, sweet words and this kind of stranger is already in our house. How you protect yourself from sudden troubles?

Melinda was big fan of social networks and she spent hours and hours by typing with strangers behind computers. One of them was Greek man Nikos. She felt in love in his voice, actions and charm. Also he introduced himself as musician and gave her password for his official site. They soon got involved even Melinda had boyfriend. Melinda got bored in safe relation and she wanted some excitements. Nikos was good partner for that, they had cool sex chat, he made her laugh and Melinda felt as she is 10 years younger than she really was. In the moment of passion, she sent to him her half naked photo .

Soon Melinda realized that Nikos has certain issues. He started to text her every hour, when she did not replied he accuse her that she is cheating him. Melinda was invited on sister’s wedding and she came there very tense, because her mobile phone was vibrating all the time. Nikos sent her insulting message : “Where are you whole day, you ungrateful bitch. What are you doing now?” Melinda felt fear and blocked his page. She could not stand this pressure.

Few days later, Melinda got message at her social page. Message was with link on other page. When she opened, she saw her photo in transparent shirt and naked boobs, and behind this was her nickname “I want cock. ” Melinda was green in face from fear. She reported site but nobody cared. She wrote letter to Nikos and begged him to leave her alone. She apologized to him for hurt his feelings, even she was not guilty. Page was there more than year and finally someone deleted this. Melinda has lived with shame, of course, she could always say that photo is not hers, but she felt embarrassed inside. After that, Melinda continued to talk with strangers, but she never shared her half naked photos again. She has learnt on harder way.

How we could know with whom we are dealing with?

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He could be handsome stranger, full of loving words, hungry for attention but the same love he gave to you could turn into revenge if you turn him back. That is how narcissists do, they will capture your heart with attention, hug you in every moment, and when they feel that you are theirs, they will turn other page. Now it is time to obey to them. He is in charge, a boss. How you dare to make conflict with boss? Now he will show you, he will hit you where you are the weakest. Did you opened your heart to him so soon? Did you opened your box of trust to him also?

Beware if you did. You gave them opened gun against you.You got his attention, but you lost his respect, because he is feeding with your feelings now.

That is why we should be careful when we talk with people on internet, when we share things which are delicate. You never know to whom you gave key of your dirty secrets.

beauty · behavior · bohemians · bullying · business · crises · depression · destiny · discrimination · drama · relations

Don’t be in the backstage

 

You know the feeling when you enter into night club with your best friend, and everybody are looking at her. Guys are racing to get her drink, even waiter is confused and she has million dance partners. You are somewhere in the background, waiting for pieces of her star dust.

Some people are born to be on the top. It is natural gift, some persons will always gain more attentions, more people will follow them, because simply they are leaders and charismatic. Like Martin Luther King said: “I have a dream.” The same worlds will sound different in his mouth, and different in the mouth of your neighbor Steve.

It is interesting how that privileged people act when they found out about their power. Will they abuse their power, will they laugh to others and use crowd for their purpose?

I had a beautiful friend. Guys were all the time around her when she was 21, and i had no chance in her presence. She was sexy, and i was just sweet. She had provocative clothes, and i had only long skirts and blouses, i was like innocent girl . Someone could compare us with Cinderella and Poison Ivy. Every guy i fall in love became her boyfriend. She was pity me, and still that was not enough, so she wanted my friendship that i can listen her impressions about everything. She used to go on some party and never invited me, but other day she would call me to tell me how was there. Always the same stories, how guys were annoyed her, how she is unhappy because of her fatal beauty. Indeed that already became sick and i started to avoid her.

After ten years we met recently at the street. She was with her husband. When he started to speak, i noticed he has feminine voice. I almost started to laugh, wow, after all this guys, she got some kind of gay idol for husband? When i looked at her, she was so skinny, she lost her sexy shape. Indeed now she was average girl, even her nose looked to big because of her care worn face. Bags under her eyes and first wrinkles completed my picture. I was shocked, where her beauty disappeared?

Yes, it is not nice to be in the shadow. You don’t live your life. You are slave of your insecurity and you are afraid that you will lose everything because your best friend is kind of Mida, person who will convert everything in gold. She is invited in all important events, and you must beg people for attention.

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What are your chances?

 

Create your circle of friends.

You need original style, your mark, don’t try to copy her or him.

Find area in which you are the best. You are winner in swimming, handball, writing, dancing for example, so show your skills.

Look at in the mirror. You have something to offer to. She has good legs, but your face is prettier. Your breasts are bigger. Show that with big boobs or good makeup.

If you notice that your friend want to push you out from everywhere, break this friendship. You are not a slave.

Beauty is not everlasting. Some people will look even better when they are getting older. Sylvester Stallone was ugly kid, but later he became sex symbol. Other will look good until they are young, but later beauty can fade. Some faces can’t resist to ages and this is visible.

Until you are in the backstage, think about how you will be on the stage. Wheel of fortune is spinning around, up and down, and this is changing. You can be on the top very soon.

behavior · character · depression · destiny · drama · psychology · relations · responsibility · society

Self-esteem is your best follower

How many times you take a look of yourself at the mirror, as your worst enemy?  So you said something like this: “I am fat. My skin is wrinkled . I have eye bags and pimples. My nose is big.” There is much exaggerating when women describe themselves. Especially if woman is young and her role model is Jennifer Lopez or Kim Kardashian, or any other famous star. Even photo shop is doing miracles, many women will compare their faces and bodies with celebrities and despair will shine from their eyes.

Here is one important thing. Even if you are pretty, you will be unhappy and your acts will reject people. Do you know why? Because you feel uncomfortable in your own skin. I remember the day when i was eighteen. It was my first time that i wore short skirt and high heels. I was thinking that everyone is staring at me. I felt as i swallow broomstick. I was clumsy and when guy in night club asked me for a dance, i was so rigid. My feet were as from wood and whole night was ruined. Not to mention that i had feeling how everyone can see my panties, because of short skirt. Indeed, nobody said to me nothing. People were busy with themselves, it was dark in this club and my fear was without reason. Ten years later i went to after beach party and i felt good. Nothing changed on my body, i even got some kilograms, but also i got something more important. It was my self confidence. Then i had so much fun and i felt like i am Miss of the beach.

Everything is in your mind. If you feel that everyone is laughing to you, probably someone will laugh, but this person will laugh because you pay attention on this. 

How to build self confidence?

Wear something what makes you comfortable. 

Find guy who will tell you often how sexy you are.

Smile, because it gives special shine to your face.

Show that you have spirit. Talk positive, make jokes, share your good mood with others.

I know, here is always that moment when you wish to be someone else. Your best friend is maybe more successful. Her husband is maybe more rich or handsome that yours. She is maybe prettier than you are. Well, you don’t know how she feels in her skin. Maybe she is very tired from successful career. Maybe her husband don’t pay attention to her anymore. Some people are masters, how to pretend that everything is all right. I had neighbor who was so kind with everyone. When she closed her door, i heard her arguments with husband and son. They used awful words and they were insulting each other so much that i felt unpleasant. When another day came, all were again happy family who had the best parties in my street.

Which is the best test for your self confidence level?

When someone mocks you, and you are smiling. Then you reply with cold mind and insult that person on smart way.

When you heard gossips about you and you don’t show any reaction.

When someone is treating you, and you are calm.

Once when you reach the highest level of self confidence, you will not care are you poor, ugly, single or alone. You will know that you can change your situation with one hint, because you have the best supporter – your healthy self-esteem.

character · destiny · drama · dreams · lovers · loyalty · prejudices · psychology · relations

Resistant couples

One day you woke up with feeling of love. Your heart is opened, people are beautiful, suddenly you greet all neighbors and you repeat the same song on CD. “I will always love you” from legend Whitney Houston. You found that perfect guy and sacred promise is that you will always love him.

At the start of every relation you don’t care what your beloved do, the point is to make him happy. Butterflies in your belly, sparks around you and him and you forget that he maybe did not wash his teeth or that he could change his shirt after few days. You love all about him, even his dog who is barking at you every time when you meet him.

After some months your perspective is changing. You will not be so blind and deaf under influence of love sparks, so you will ask some things from your boyfriend. Don’t be late every time when i have deal with you. Please don’t talk on your cell phone when i am talking with you. Conflicts rise up from small details. Something was not bothering you before, but now you pay attention on this. Now you are under test of maturity. Yes, he said that he loves you, but did he prove this with his actions?

People are changing, life is variable line. You fall in love before 5 years in that girl, but she is not the same person now. She got 15 kilograms, her hair is different color, she doesn’t wear short shirts and skirts anymore, she has problem with teeth. Time is cruel. Do you love this girl as before? Also, your boyfriend can lose hair or his muscles are not so firm anymore. 



Couples will handle this changes on various ways.

Some couples will be separated. 

No, i can’ t handle this anymore. The person i loved doesn’t exist.

Some couples will cheat each other. 

I don’t want to leave him, but i need refreshment in my life.

Some couples will stay together. 

Ok, you can lose this kilograms with my help, not big deal. I like you as you are. Your personality is still beautiful.

It is not just about physical look. Life circumstances are different. He was poor guy, now he is rich businessman. He has bigger choice. Now he can pick girls who don’t want to look at him before. He is good catch. 

She is famous and she is in different circles. Maybe you are just her obstacle now. She has career and she is travelling a lot, and she has no time for you anymore. Your interests are not the same. 

Famous couple David Beckham and Victoria Adams met in 1997. She was famous singer known as Posh Spice, from Spice girls.  He was footballer, he played for Manchester United, but in that time he was not famous. She was more popular than he was. During 17 years, things changed. They got married, now they have 4 children. David Beckham became one of the most popular footballers at world. He is also model inspiration for marketing, he is brand. Victoria is not in music world anymore, she is now fashion creator, but her husband is more popular than she is. They survived tough period, when David was cheating her with Spanish girl Rebecca and this was even on television. David ashamed Victoria in public media, but they did not divorced never. They solved their problems and together they are introduced even to British queen. 

Love is not just box full of sparks and stars. Love is much more than you can imagine. If you are ready to skip over all obstacles, to make your hands dirty, to forgive and forget, then you will get real love. Everything else is just an illusion and adventure.

addiction · cyber · cyber space · depression · destiny · flirt · fraud · freedom · happiness · relations

Mouse trap for adults


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We are all victims of some kind of illusions, because life is more beautiful in dreams. It is better to drink and watch movie about perfect life, than woke up with alarm in early morning and go to work which you don’t like but you need money to survive.

Viral mouse traps are in every corner. Bunch of people sharing adds about better job, easy way to get money and perfect business chance. If you buy newspaper you will see page with predictions about better future, about tarot cards, crystal ball and similar kind of misleads, from Zodiac until cup of black coffee with hidden messages for you.

The biggest trap for any kind of misleads and deceptions is internet. There adult people dream about perfect love, perfect business opportunity and generally, about big escape from routine and reality. Well of course there are nice examples , people who were following their dreams and turn them into reality, so everyone thinks that is what they will get, too. Another Bill Gates, Steve Jobs or similar discovery?

Some are more modest and they are asking only love from their dreams. Mysterious person to change their life, to solve all problems with only one touch. 

First step is to open web camera, but then you can be disappointed. Oh, that is not he or her, picture were more beautiful? Expectations fall into water, what now? 

Then it happens, real meeting.

Here are impressions : Oh , i did not expect that he is so boring or that she is so complicated woman? She was asking only for money to escape from her poor country. He was asking only for sex because he got bored with his fat wife and marriage full of obligations.

 

What happens in the worst case is more serious. We could read about missing persons, crime cases, all troubles which appeared only with the one click of mouse. This stories had start when we log into some social network.

Once upon a time only children believed in fairy tales. After kids found out that Santa Claus doesn’t exist and that Tooth fairy is not real, some cried. Others laughed for being so naive.

Today, adults are also victims. They suffer from another kind of fictional stories, mouse traps for adults. Should we cry or laugh when our illusion gone? No, we should learn and realize that in every age is possible to get fooled. 

If you are too emotional, if you love risks and you just hate boredom , this traps will be still for you as kind of black angels. Walk through this battlefield with gloves and play carefully not to get burn.

behavior · cyber · depression · discrimination · erotica · illusion · relations

Being easy or hard trophy?

Royal Visit to Canada - Day Four

It is possible very fast to rate someone as easy to get. Jump in other bed after 2 days of dating, changing guys more often that socks, and running for someone who doesn’t want you.

When gossips start, the question is “Why they labelled me as easy?” And why he is not an easy man, and instead of mockery, he got title as Casanova and macho man?



As much this society is progressing, some things will always be the same. Do not call guy, do not run for him. Not because you must be old fashioned girl and wait for his step. It is because guys are hunters, and when you take things in your hands, you take away their power to decide. They can feel as feminine, weak person who must wait woman to choose them.



A long time ago my friend asked me why her lover never appeared with her in publicity. Why he is dating with other girl, and why she is only sex partner for him?

The answer is “because he can get all what he wants inside his car, so why he should bother to pay her drink in nightclub, to spend money on seducing, when she already offers all what he wants.”

She was crying and suffering but he was never her real boyfriend. He was indeed ashamed of her.

When you gave sex on the first or on the second date, you are killing the magic. Maybe you can save yourself if you don’t call him after that, let he wonder , you are the one who used him. But for this you must have experience and cold heart. 

Also, if you agree with everything he said or did, you are also easy. Let him to go out with guys for weekend, let he travels without you, let he drink large amounts of vodka or wine, you love him, oh you so much love him and you will accept all this for the sake of love.



Where is the challenge in all this? 

He will get bored and he will cut you from his life. And you will ask, oh why he did this, i let him to do all what he wants.

This is the answer. Because it was too easy. Well, next time you might remember and not repeat this if you want something more. If you want just adventure, than you can’t mistake. In short love stories everything is allowed , because you don’t need to think about future. You can learn from this situation, and see the difference why some guys want to stay with you and other not. The problem is, teaching lessons on own skin is very expensive. Until you learn, you might turn into monster and play dirty, so next time you will not recognize guy who really cares for you. 

communication · cyber space · depression · drama · erotica · illusion · internet · psychology · society

Virtual alter ego

 

One of the biggest cheaters in virtual world are fake profiles. Imagine that you share your problems, dreams and daily routine with charming stranger and you found out that person is fake. You would not believe what kind of creeps are hiding under avatars and what are people able to do in internet, just to get some attention.

When i say fake, there are many possibilities.

About gender. You may think that your best friend is a man, but she is a woman. Yes, women also make fake pages and represent themselves as men. What is purpose? One is to hide their real sex orientation. Other is to fool competition. So, if you like guy in virtual world, and you have tough competition, you can open page and pretend that you are man. Naive women will come at your page, and if you are enough sophisticated, you can flirt with them. During this, your real man target is focused on you, because you took this girls at your page. Sick, i know. 

About race. You can pretend that you are white race even you are Afro american, because maybe your virtual soul mate want this.

About ages. Woman is 55 years old, but she will tell she has 30. Very often this kind of lie is spreading around, especially when young guys capture attention of some women.

About social status. Men like to lie that they are rich, powerful businessmen. Women will lie that they are actress, managers or dancers.

About fame. People will lie that they are footballers, models or any kind of celebrities. Who would not like to be Shakira or Beyonce? Or if you want to introduce yourself as less familiar celebrity , as local drummer or singer, maybe people will swallow lie.

About body shape. Typical woman lie. She will tell that she is average weight or skinny, but fatty one is under her photo. Some women has special skill to hide fat parts on photos and post only pretty face. So if you invite her out, you may get cold shower.

About place or country where you live. It is more in to say that you live in capital or in big city, than in small village. That kind of fraud will use men to expose themselves as good choices.

Accord one poll, women are in fear to meet serial killer when they date online, and men are afraid of fat women.

Impostors will use the fact that many people in virtual world are unhappy. They need nice word, kindness, compliments. Also people ask for love. If you have excellent communication skills , this space is yours.

What is very interesting, once when you wash someone’s brain, and if your communication is lasting for a months or even a year, your target will be addicted to you. Even if you later expose real you, you created cool image about your alter ego and half job is done.

Many people at internet will talk about broken hearts, because they believed blindly. Impostors could go so far that they ask your phone number. You will listen his or her voice, but you will not see the person. Or he will ask you to open camera, but you will see only dark spot in square at Skype. 

The most funny excuses, why some people never opened camera even you give them trust, are next:

My camera doesn’t work, it is broken.

I don’t have camera.

I am shy.

I am not ready yet to show my face.

I opened to some people, but i don’t wish to open to you.

I am never alone so my parents or brother would disturb me.

You don’t like my soul? Why you need camera? You are superficial and you don’t see my beautiful character.

Attack is the best defense so impostors will get nervous once when you start to doubt, and especially if you can reveal them evidences against them. They will say that you don’t deserve their love or friendship. Then, they will delete page and made new, to make fools in some other social networks.