Friendship is a complicated process. We met someone and our bond is established. Day by day this connection is stronger and we feel trust, devotion, and loyalty toward that person. We opened a book of confidence and every message there developed from the heart.
Friends for a lifetime is a big statement. How can we be sure that we will be in contact with the same person we met in childhood?
What happens when circumstances changed?
Some people we simply left behind us. It is not because we are nasty or evil. Simply, some people can’t fit in our life anymore and they are considered a garden.
A real friend will understand our silence, bad mood and lack of time. This relation is swing, we will rock this swing right and left. If one person drags things always on the same side, this is selfishness.
How does it look like?
Do I need something from you, why you did not do this for me?
I want to drink coffee today with you, find time for me.
Why did you not answer my message or call?
I always have right, you know I am smarter part of our friendship.
Selfish people also don’t want to be alone, but they will use friends as toys, accord their moods. If you don’t think and act same as they do, you will not be at their mercy.
Daniel and Leonardo were two buddies. Daniel was a geek, and Leonardo was a manual worker, but he was not stupid, he was just too lazy to study and educate himself. Daniel used this position to underestimate his friend and to rule with this relation accord his views. When someone asked Leonardo what he thinks about government, Daniel jumped with his statement “Why you ask him, he knows how to put nails in the wall, but I don’t remember when he read a newspaper last time. ” He hurt his friend without thinking, and it was the start of the disaster. For years, they stopped to see each other. Leonardo was uneducated, but he was not stupid, and he had dignity.
Why some friendship broke, and others are still alive? As we are progressing in life, we will think in a different way and we will have different habits. You love your friend from high school, but he stayed on the same level, you have no topic to discuss with him. When you tried, he is so surprised how times are changed.
Life will lead us in different directions and sometimes our friends will follow us. We are together through thick and thin. You can do it. Your friend maybe doesn’t understand what you chase or what you wish, but you have his support.
The problems appear when your friend disagree with you on everything. This is kind of trig. You are driving, he wants to stand in your way. Even worse, instead of support you got a judgment, he is so surprised. What, why you want to leave this safe job? Do you want this insecure investment? In this case, our connection will be more and weaker. Now, you are not on the same level anymore.
So ask yourself, do you have some friends from childhood, high school, from the workplace, neighborhood? You grew up with them, but where are they now? If you cut some bonds, it doesn’t make you a bad person. If you did all efforts to keep your friend and he doesn’t care, then is time to let it go.
Imagine this as a race. You were running, and some people reach the same aim, you are now with them on the same team. Other people were too slow or they gave up on this race. Those are not on the same team with you anymore.