Tolerance is beautiful human value. It shows as path to handle people when there is no reason for this. It shows us how much our nerves are strong. Also we learn about ourselves, where are our limits. How much bad things some person can do, before we erase her from our life? It depends about level of your tolerance.
When you love someone, your tolerance is higher than usual. In the moment when you start to look this person with sparks in your eyes, you will lose objectivity. Everything you learnt with years could be forgotten. You learnt that you can’t run for person or beg her, you know that you can’t allow someone to humiliate you. All this lessons will be covered with star dust of love. One his smile, and you will forget why you get angry on him. One his kiss, you will remember just why you love him.
People are not saints, and forgiveness is not unconditional. Before or after, you will realize situations when your beloved person take an advantage of you, and it will change your focus. Now you look at him with clear sight, your eye lenses are not full of love dust anymore. Adjust your focus and see what’s went wrong.
In these situations, you should not forgive your beloved partner:
He forgot your birthday even he knows you many years.
When you mentioned this, he was harsh and he started to yell on you. “What, i should remember every stupid thing about you?”
He cheated you with your best friend.
He broke your trust in this way and you can’t look at him with the same eyes.
He was disrespectful toward your parents, relatives or best friends.
If he doesn’t respect them, he doesn’t respects you either.
He was not with you when you lost dear family member or when you were ill.
If he can’t be with you in your worst time, he doesn’t deserve your best time.
Partner who beats you is your murderer, not your love.
The more credits you give to someone who cheats and lie, you will be more far from him.
Person who once abused your trust will not delay to do it again. If he was unpunished then, he will dare to cross another line. You might think this: “He will always come back to me because i tolerate him everything. So he knows he can’t get this from someone else.”
In this case, what you get? You have husband who enter to your bed after he was with another women. You have partner who will buy you flowers after he slapped you. Maybe you can brag to your friends that you found someone who will never leave you. Your inner voice will tell you that you dealt with devil.