Word friendship is overrated. If you are naive, easy going person, you will call everyone your friend. There is classification, in which cases someone grows enough to be your friend.
1 level : acquaintance – person you met recently, and you like it at first sight
2 level : colleague – person who works with you, but you don’t know nothing at first sight about him
3 level : roommate – someone who lives with you by certain circumstances, if you are in dorm or rented flat, someone you share office because you work together
4 level : friend, because you both want it
5 level : best friend, someone you can trust more than others
People often mix friendship with rivality. Rival or competitor is person who pretends friendship with you, but indeed she wants to compete with you and to do everything better than you. The trouble is, if you are better in some area, person will show envy and jealousy . She will try to sabotage you, and having such person in your circle is similar as you live with mole in your garden. So, here is flowers and green grass, but somehow it doesn’t smell like you expect. Something ruins that flowers.
As example of real rivality i will mention girl i knew before many years. Recently she met my mother and asked for me, even we did not see each other 15 years. Still, she wanted to know details about me, my partner, my job and what is going on. When we were friends, she was always comparing herself with me. If some guy would be interested for me, she would say : “He was flirting with me too. ” If someone talked bad about me, she would pass me information with apology that she sorry for hear this. If she heard something good, she would make it as meaningless information. We broke our friendship when i realized that i don’t need this in my life. I had more respectful enemies, at least they did not pretend that they like me.
Even you maybe think that someone is your good friend, circumstances will show different view.
You will see is this connection between you and x person rivality or real friendship.
Your friend is close with your enemy.
Ok, we have choice to whom we will talk, but if your friend spend more time with person who hurts you than with you, think about friendship.
Your friend is too spontaneous in company of your boyfriend.
If your friend wants to hug and kiss your boyfriend, and she says that she do this because of some “brotherly love”, think about real motives.
Your friend always forward you gossips.
“She talked bad about you. He laughed to you. I heard he doesn’t like you. ” Ok, it is not bad to know what others think about you, but if your friend constantly forward gossips, she maybe enjoys to make you sad.
Your friend is not here when you need him. Never.
Friendship is alley with two sides. You will do him favor, he will do it for you. Well, if you constantly give, and never take, if he is making excuses why he can’t help you, this is not real friendship.
Your friend is not happy when you are happy.
More, he ask some tiny things to make your happiness smaller. For example, you got job in another city, and he says : “You will be so tired, by travelling every day. “
Moles are animals which do damage. Mole is symbol of cracked, ruined friendship, because someone doesn’t like you as you thought. Be careful when you deal with mole, because on long terms, this friendship is much worse than war with enemy.
With enemy, you know clear that he doesn’t like you. Mole will make your sight foggy, and you can get lost in this blind alley.