When we are playing roles?
Every workplace has own rules and if you wish to fit in, your skills will be focused how to survive. You will learn fake smile, sweet words and smarmy behavior, even that is not real you.
When someone introduces you to his parents and relatives.
Now, you will be an actor. Can you tell the mother of your boyfriend that you changed guys as socks before you met her son? No, you can’t so you will be innocent, the kind flower who discovered life at the moment when you met him.
In politician groups and circles. You want to be a candidate for next elections? You wish that people vote for you? If you are hasty, aggressive and troublemaker, people will not trust you. But, why to tell the truth? Now you wear the nice business suit so you can act role of the gentleman.
Sometimes you will not be sad because someone died. Especially if that is your boss or mother in law, you will feel relief if they made your life bitter. What you will do? Cry and wipe fake tears, make the sad face and give condolence to their families.
At business meetings.
Now you are pretending that you are listening, that you are so fascinated with some ideas or projects. In fact, you can’t wait, when this will be finished? You will not say that you get bored. You will say that it was so useful meeting and then is time to ask questions, to show interest.
Some situations are appropriate for playing roles. That is not hypocrisy, that is just survival. Your mask will protect your interest, but also in that way you are protecting others, you are not embarrassing them, and all are happy.
If you need to pretend in your free time, that is a problem. You have a special person in your life and she doesn’t like real you? Now you can’t reveal your real face, that mask will be with you forever. Maybe you need to die inside, for the sake of your partner.
The problem in human nature is in expectations. It is nice to see the happy and kind face, but the truth is somewhere else. We can adopt some patterns of behavior for some occasions, but we are not robots, and this schedule will have failures.
The key to happiness is in acceptance of others imperfections. Our kindness has limits, as our patients. Every person knows when is time to show real, naked truth, and when is time to hide this bomb. If we don’t have understanding, this bomb will explode in an unexpected moment. Then everybody could ask, who are you and how they did not see this before. That hypocrisy was on their way, but they skipped over it.