What is indeed romantic?

 

C-JJ3VYXcAAYFEo

Stereotypes develop from childhood. Differences between genders grow through traditional values , modify with time, but skeletons stay unchanged , no matter about fashion and progress. Let me remind you, if you gave birth to boy, what will you buy him as toy? Little car, ball or plastic gun? If you gave birth to girl, what will you buy to her? Doll, pink dress or flowers? As we made labels for seats, we also labelled women and men, to see why is something suitable, and why other things are not appropriate.

Ask random man what he would buy to woman. He will say : roses , if i like her. Red roses for love, white roses for appreciation, yellow roses for honor and friendship, and orange roses as sign of passion. Well, did you ask her, do you like flowers, anyway?

Some women will melt on first sight, when they get flowers. “Oh, how nice. He is real gentleman. ” Others will say : “What i will do with this roses, when they fade? I have no nerves to change water every day, besides, i have allergy. ” Despite of all , some men will treat women on equal way, and they will think that roses are universal recipe to capture woman’s heart.

Do you want drag woman to bed? Give her roses.

Do you want to make an apology because you hurt her? Give her roses.

You want to borrow money from her? Give her roses.

You want to say goodbye to her? Give her roses.

Poor flowers suffer from so much purposes, and the most funny part is when flower is artificial or not fresh. Faded roses at desk are dead nature, as artificial rose petals. Well, that is flower, who made difference, even it doesn’t smell nice?

Now, i bet everyone of you met granny with roses. If you visit coffee bars or night clubs, you have seen this creature. Old woman who wish to sell bunch of roses, because that is tradition, that is appropriate. Which kind of woman doesn’t want roses, she must be masculine or at least not well mannered.

When granny with roses approach to you and your partner, she is ready to manipulate. Now, see next scenario in your minds.

Your partner :  “Damn, i should buy her rose.  She will think that i am idiot without feelings. “

You : “If i don’t accept, he will think that i am not a lady. “

So, granny with roses wait to get her money. For sure, she plays on feeling of guilt. She spread poisoned arrows in both ways, to make couple guilty by default. Man buy rose, and woman smile and said : “oh, thank you dear. ” Granny puts money in the pocket.

I am not afraid to say that granny is promoter of bullshit. I saw many times old lady who was disturbing and annoying by her attempts to sell roses. Maybe you wish to whisper on your partner’s ear or kiss him, and she came between you to offer you rose , without respect to your privacy. Also, buying flowers should be spontaneous act. On this way, your partner is trapped. Maybe he spent last money on drinks, and now he must buy rose?

What granny with roses offer is far away from love and respect. She is selling product. She is kind of beggar, just not without money. Also, she is challenger, to check are you and partner on the same line. If you both agree, accept this flower. Well, if you not, send her to hell.

Women are caught in the network of rivalry. I got roses, you did not get. I am pretty, you are ugly. This funny circle is made of vanity, not from love. Roses which granny offered are faded, a long time ago. It just looks like sign of attention, this is indeed moral blackmail.

Advertisements

What happens on date from nightmare?

C6wJHuVWoAMlsiZ

It is first date and you want to hear good impression about yourself. Think before speak, and when you speak behave yourself. It is very different situation when you sit in front of person which you don’t know well. You can use profanity if you meet with your best friend because he got used to it. Well, if you say “hello hootie” to girl on first date, you will be labelled as jerk. In this case girl might feel cheap or as your number, and you sound as someone without manners.

Young guys are often not aware that girls are sensitive, and what sounds as joke could be bad echo in their ears, as mocking.

What she doesn’t want to hear?

– you look fat in this skirt

– these boots look cheap

– there is something in your breath, did you eat garlic for dinner?

– you remind me on my ex girl

– can you pay this bill, i have no enough money for tonight

Also, girls sometimes not understand that man is not their therapist, mother or shoulder for crying.

 


What he doesn’t want to hear?

I have so painful period, i bleed so much.

– Do you like my makeup?

– What type of car you drive? 

– My ex boyfriend is here, i feel so nervous.

– Do you think i am pretty?

biting-lip.jpg

This is story from real life.

Sandra and Darren went to date and he took her out of the city. This was small coffee bar with so loud folk music that she did not hear what he is talking. They waited for a waiter for a half hour and they were not alone, because Darren met his best friend with girlfriend so they shared table with them. That girl provoked Sandra that Darren is indeed womanizer and that he will not be faithful to her. She said she was joking, but Sandra felt very unpleasant.

Second date never happened.

If you wish to avoid date from nightmare:

be alone with your partner

– don’t talk about ex 

– try to choose quiet place 

– focus on her or him

– don’t look at your cell phone every 10 minutes

– don’t stare in every good looking person around

You want to arrange second date, isn’t it? Think about things you said because first date can be the last if you do many mistakes.

Some people are flexible and they will forgive mistakes, but next time they will look at you with doubts. First impression doesn’t come twice and you can’t fix it. You might learn what you do wrong, so next partner will have more luck.

Do you recognize rejection from cold-warm strategy in romance? (for men)

C3qiJWfXAAA9AWs

Role of hunter is not grateful position. Men are by nature leaders, and from them is expected to do first steps. Especially, if they wish to get certain woman, they must be ready for everything, from gentle rejection until harsh kick in the butt. As much real man will take leash in his hands, he will also know when to back off, and when is time to stop with his attempts.

Unfortunately, some guys are not so wise to recognize real rejection from warm-cold strategy. This is also women fault, so women will play and make fool of men in some situations.

How to separate real rejection from warm-cold strategy?

If woman is interested for you, and she is not yet sure, she will give double signs.

She will say no if you invite her for date, but her next sentence will be : “Maybe next time, i will let you know.”

She will let you to follow her into her street, but she will not invite you in her flat.

She will talk with you, but you will not get permission to kiss her.

She will even sleep with you, but next day she will be unavailable.

She will delete you from Facebook but she will not block your page. Just , for any case, she may expect your message.

If woman is not interested for you, she will not give you any chance to repeat your questions about her and you.

If you call her, she will block your number.

If you send her message, she will block your page.

Follow her, she will call her friends for help. 

She will appear with another man in front of your eyes if you are annoying. This is very clear sign.

If you try to kiss her, she will push you away. Alert, here you are in danger zone. She can slap you.

Some men are not gentlemen and they don’t accept other choices. Real gentleman will accept word no with silence and dignity. This man will not make you troubles. Also, you might sorry because he will never disturb you later. He asked you once , you denied, and he gone. Your problem is another man, called jerk. Jerk will chase you and spread gossips. Jerk will tell you that you are whore, fat or short, and that you are ugly. All because you did not want to date with him.

The worst follower of rejection is denial. If you deny to yourself that person rejected you, if you repeat her words and ask some hidden meaning, you are on wrong path. Some guys think : “She said no? Maybe she is shy? Or her friends talked bad about me? Maybe she is not ready today, but i can wait. ”

Delusional guys are often jerks. They can’t admit to themselves that some women don’t accept them. They must learn how to accept negative answers. Until then, such men will hunt in blurry zone.

It is possible to be alone in relation

17021742_481592695563386_2929045630433809915_n

Once my hairdresser asked me: “Do you have boyfriend?” I said yes, and she said with deep sigh: “Thanks God, because if you never had boyfriend, it would not be all right with your sanity. “

That  provincial judgment made me smile, cause relation is not guarantee for happiness, neither is loneliness sign of misery. Do you know how is to feel alone in marriage or in relation?

At first sight, everything is nice because you pleased social conventions. Formally, you are not alone and you are worthy accord standards, because you have someone. If you look at this deeper, you will find many things under shinny surface, which are not so fairy .

In romantic movies two people met each other, make love and got married. Then they get children, have little conflicts because of breakfast, dog or furniture, make peace and live together forever. In real life such story has no logic. Relations are hard and marriage is hard, especially if two people are not in collaboration.

Logic question for any unhappy person in marriage would be: “Why don’t you leave him or her?” There are many reasons, including financial, why is that not possible over night. It takes time, nerves, money and it leaves pieces of broken heart, damaged trust and dead hope.

CzoBCSbUQAA_0Y2

Well, how is to feel alone in relation?

You make plans, and partner is silent.

You have problems at work and want to talk about this, your partner is ignorant.

You came home from work and want to make love, your partner is sleeping because he is tired.

You want to watch movie together, but your partner has no energy and will to comment with you.

Did you ever feel that you want to escape from reality and wake up somewhere else, where you will not see grumpy face and dead shine in eyes of your ignorant partner, where he will not blame you for his frustrations and where some dark stranger will hug you to forget everything?

In the movie “Purple rose of Cairo” Mia Farrow got lost in her dreams and she enter into movie screen to be together with her favorite actor. Later she realize that imaginary world is not hers, that is even worse than reality. Just, she learnt to grab courage, and she is leaving her nasty boyfriend who can’t do even small house work without her help.

The point of one sided relation is lack of courage. You live with parasite who suck your blood and you feel sorry for him but he will not say thanks for this.

Don’t feel alone in relation when you can be alone single. I had relation where i was alone. Guy called me every third day, his phone was busy when i needed him and i did not know am i in relation with him still because he never said that he will break up with me.

That is how syndrome “alone in relation” works out. That is sneaky cancer which attack your soul, bite you inside until it grabs your heart and make pieces of it.

Do you believe in love at first sight?

DGtOczTW0AEJnX1

She is very nervous because she has an appointment. She is walking fast and suddenly someone is on her way. What is even worse, coffee to go is in her hands. Suddenly here is crash, her head hit into head of handsome guy. She wanted to kill him, but their eyes met and that is the beginning of love story.

Such stories we can see in romantic movies. Love at first sight is connection between two strangers. It happens on way that sparks appear between them in one moment, even they never met before.

What is truth, and what is only legend in love at first sight? First, can we tell that we immediately love someone we recently met?

Eye contact can produce sparks, and if person of opposite gender is staring at you longer than is polite, you got new fan. There is statistic, you have four minutes to develop conversation between you and desirable person. If that conversation is short and if you need to drag words from his/her mouth, that person is not interested.

Women like to believe at love in first sight.

Why is this fairy tale so popular? 

Here are some reasons:

You don’t make much efforts to search for ideal partner. There is no need for calling, stalking, spy on him on internet or clubs or at workplace. He will just come one day in front of your nose.

Your love is written in the stars. So, just wait, it will for sure happen because that is destiny.

Your pride and ego are safe. Now is no need that you beg your friend to introduce you to someone, don’t need to ask phone number or to seduce guys with your short skirt or smell of perfume. He will come to you anyway.

You have good reason to be unavailable to anyone else. Now you are waiting your Prince charming , and everyone else has no chance. He will be recognized in your eyes.

Love at first sight is easy going event. No need for any obstacles, all will be perfect, you just relax and wait. What is indeed true?

 

 

You can feel physical attraction on first sight and there are many people who had sex for one night. This is energy, you want to do it. You simply like that person so you feel free to suggest that.

Real love will never develop for few minutes or for a short time. That is just good start, intro in something good to happen later. What will be next is not so predictable. You kissed him and that kisses were unforgettable, but will he call you again? How can you be sure that your meeting was so fatal that he will call you tomorrow?

In real love, we can’t be sure how this story will develop later. But, we will take a risk because person is worthy of try. Love is kind of silent deal, we will continue this, so let’s see about future. That is why is connection at first sight good kind of intro. You skipped all annoying procedures and now when you got certain signs, that is motivation for next chapter.

Some my friends said that in the start all was beautiful, and things went on wrong path later. How is it possible that prince “loved” you so much in first date, and later he chilled out? Love can’t fade over night, so we need to learn how to read between lines.

This feeling is similar as you were drunk. You will have dizziness, your face will blush, heart will skip a beat, and your voice will tremble. That is first love attack, it hits very strong. Later, things will change. After some time you will know is this real or not.

Don’t be so disappointed if things will not go as you expected. That is kind of carnival. Beautiful masks and dance, after people show real faces. Some are pleasant and beautiful , some are ugly. That is reality. So, when you catch some eyes on you, enjoy until it last and be ready for all options.

Status: bachelor

Magic of love connected them in few moments. Sparks are around this couple, and she felt that is time to settle down. She asked him important question: “Would you like to marry with me?”

Suddenly, fire balls stop to spread lights, and everything turn into ash. He is numb, because he has no answer on this question. If he accepts, he will sacrifice his sexual life forever. If he says NO, this gorgeous woman will be hurt. So he decided for diplomatic answer : “I am not ready to get marry yet. ” She heard only word “yet” and this was another flame to warm up her hope.

Bachelors are type of men who think that time is limitless. It is alright to be bachelor in 25, but what is in 35, 45, or even 55 year? Young guys, who just step up into this life are joking about marriage. They are cheerful because they grab every chance to please their wishes and satisfaction is in status single. As long you are single, or at least you are not officially married, all paradise is in front of you.

What are misleads about bachelor status?

I always have time. Life is indeed short.

I did not find right woman to get marry. She is maybe in front of your nose, but you don’t see it.

I will not have any obligations. Yes, you will, just you will wash and ironing your clothes alone. Or with a help of your mother, who is getting older every day.

I don’t want to spend my money on wife and children. Even worse, you will spend money on alcohol, gambling and lot of activities because you are getting bored.

I will always have lot of friends. Wrong. Your friends are getting married, every day you will have less and less free guys to have party with them.

When i will have 50, young gorgeous woman is waiting for me. Women are not stupid and also we have taste. If man is not extremely rich , women will not even look at him.

The main difference between single woman (or unmarried) and bachelor is in attitude of society. Unmarried woman is woman with deadline. She is not so desirable, if she is already 30 or 40. Her time for having children is passing, her body is not perfect, wrinkles are here and her circle of fans is getting smaller. Bachelor is more desirable. He is now more mature, he is earning his own money, he has flat and now he needs only future wife. Business circles will ask for status, because married businessman is better candidate than single man. Politicians will ask for family man with obligations. Also, magazines will have list of handsome bachelors, as opportunities for women.

It is very interesting how society will label man as bachelor, even he is in relation or in cohabitation. Only formal paper means that man is out of this race.

Recently, yellow press wrote about George Clooney who finally engaged with woman lawyer, so she was marked as woman who caught him. They said, she was unavailable to him and he fall on old trick.

What is a recipe to catch bachelor? 

Universal recipe doesn’t exist. That is man decision. He wants you or he doesn’t want you. You can use some old tricks, but finally choice is his. Celebrities have much bigger choice and they will be more hard to get. Ordinary men will try to find woman accord their standards. There is one fact, some men will never get married. Simply, they did not feel they are ready on time, and time passed so they are still alone. One thing is sure, if you feel that you are bachelor , tell it to your woman, she deserve to know the truth. Give her time to find someone who is ready to settle down.

How people lie at first date?

C6wJHuVWoAMlsiZ

Truth is naked, and lies are well dressed. Do we always want to hear naked truth, without imagination, just straight into face?

There are so called white lies, sweet ways to avoid truth or to make truth more beautiful, with some updates.

Men and women use different lies. When we start to know special person, we want to expose ourselves in best edition.

Men wish to expose themselves as brave heroes, rich entrepreneurs or candidate for stable relation, so they add some stories to their CV.

 

Men will say:

 

1. i have fast car

 

2. i have well paid job and good education from university

 

3. i was with many women, all were crazy for me, but you are special

 

4. i travel around world

 

5. i have very good business connection, my boss indeed eat from my hands

6. i broke teeth of some bad guys

What is the truth?

 

1. i stuck between credits for my car and house, i will be without money soon

2. i hate my job but i need it to survive

3. i am looser because all my ex broke up with me, or i don’t have much experience in love, i am virgin, i had only 2 women in my life etc.

4. i was never outside of my country

5. really i am intruder and nobody at my work don’t even notice me

6. i runaway from hooligans

 

So, if you had first date, what would you prefer? To know naked truth about guy who is indeed looser, or sweet lies ? That guy must have good insurance that you will wish to see him again.

 

Well he lies about his car, about his salary, maybe even about size of his penis and his skills in bed. But maybe you will found out that he is creative and able to deal with every situation, so it will be your challenge. On other hand, guy who represent himself as looser will be denied on first step. Imagine you met guy who says :”I live with my mother , she is retired and paralyzed and she gives me money for survival, i had no sexual experience during 3 years, and i am dying to see you again.”

 

Nobody likes despair, so it will be turn off. Real truth is somewhere in the middle. We women are asking for potential, ambitious guy who will show courage to deal with hard reality. Even we can forgive him lies later if he is able to change his present life.

 

Women like to represent themselves as pure so they will lie about number of sex partners. Also they will lie about ages, natural look and relations.

How women say lies?

 

1. i had sex only with one guy 

 

2. i am 20 or 25 year old (in fact 30-40)

 

3. my color of hair is natural

 

4. i don’t use much makeup

 

5. lies about weight and height are also on the top, high heels and belly belt will do good  deception , so woman can look slimmer or taller

6. i rejected many guys cause i am picky


What is the truth?


1. i slept with few guys before you

2. i am not so young

3. my hairdresser is responsible for my styling

4.  i will not get out from house without lipstick

5. i was on many diets

6. there is a long time since someone invited me at date

Women will lie with clothes, makeup, even with tears. What would guys prefer? To see woman without makeup on first date, without fancy clothes, and that she admit to him her sexual experience? “Yes, i slept with two best friends, i had few one night stands, but that is a life.”

 

Men doesn’t want to get rid of his vision about innocent women so fast. They want sleeping beauty from fairy tales, and later she can expose her real truth.

So, yes, truth is honest , but lies are here to protect us – at least at the beginning.