Don’t steal what is not yours

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Modesty is one of values. It is connected with respect of others, that we should not touch something what is not ours. Don’t steal, don’t desire other’s partners, don’t be greedy. You are satisfied with your life, your car and even if you are not, don’t blame others.

Some people will say – never enough. They will run over corpses, they will push you during their race, all until the day when they will regret it. It is alright to be ambitious and to desire more. Now, here is the question, how to make harmony between modesty and your wishes to get more?

Let’s take a look about story of Sybil. She is married woman, with one pretty daughter and devoted husband. She has 42 years. She got bored in marriage so she made profile at Facebook and find virtual lover. They made fake profile together and everybody in virtual life know about them as couples. After some time she got bored with this virtual sweetness, cyber sex and attention so she started to look at other social networks for new young guys to please her wishes. She doesn’t care if that guy has a girl, if she could hurt feelings of some girl with posting her erotic photos on their pages. One day someone hacked her page, and she became hurt, after long time. She thought that nobody can stop her. But someone did, and even worse, she was reported for posting pornography and admins of social networks deleted her page. It was not the end, her daughter find erotic video from her mum with masturbating and she had conversation with shrink. All family went into crises. They could not understand what kind of monster Sybil was. She had everything, but she wanted jealousy of other people, fight, envy, publicity. She paid for this.

When you enter into other’s space, this is like in football. You try to get your score, but someone can throw you and hit you very hard. Life is rough game. If you think that you can humiliate others, don’t expect that you will not get paycheck. Don’t justify your acts with ambitious wishes.

World is big place.

Is it necessary to ruin other’s happiness because you want more?

You don’t have to steal other job or position at work to be happy. 

You don’t have to seduce other’s husbands to please your wishes. 

If you grab into other’s property, you can stay without hand and lose everything. 

How would you feel that someone kiss your husband or to gossip you in front of your boss, just to sit on your chair at work?

I don’t want what is not mine, but also i protect what is mine. Once when someone starts unfair game, there are no rules. All is allowed in the name of justice, and that kind of intruders will get what they deserve.

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Where is your weak spot?

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The way how we pass through obstacles shows magnitude of our character. How we handle burden, it depends of our strength. Human is not a machine, and every person owes weak spot.

So, when someone wants to hurt you, to use you or to make fool from you, that person will hit you into your weak spots, weakest targets where you never expected explosion.

Ahil was Greek hero, and accord legend his weak spot was his feet. So when arrow hit his feet,  Trojan prince Paris killed him. He knew about his weak spot.

When conflict starts, our rival will try to find weakness. It will be something you most care about and you can’t live without it. This means, your beloved treasure is your suicide bomb.

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Be careful to protect your sensitive areas.

your children

– your honor

– your job

– your money

– beloved husband or wife

This example shows what happens when person reveals her weak spot.

 

Amy was very strong woman, she raised after every problem, and she knew how to carry her burden. She accepted that life did not treat her well and life struggles were her reality. Then she met Bob. He was kind, romantic, sweet as little boy. Behind his sweet face was manipulative nature. He was indeed spoiled son of his mother, and every wrong word made him frustrated. He loved attention, and he was surrounded by many women. Amy did not like that, because women at his workplace were rude toward her, even older women acted like she doesn’t exist. So they had argument and Bob decided to split.

Amy handled this as usual, she was ready to continue with her life. But she was unpleasantly surprised when people at her work laughed to her when she came to office. Bob passed through email her photo in sexy underwear with whip in her hands, the photo she sent to him as gift for his birthday. She was embarrassed. Then she cried for a first time. Bob felt finally that he is winning. He found her weak spot, it was her honor and dignity. It was worse than slap in her face. Amy has changed workplace but she never forgot what he did. From that event she has never sent similar photos to anyone. She learnt that trust is fragile value.

 

Conclusion: if you don’t trust someone, if you doubt in good intention of some people, think about. Do they have something dangerous to hurt you? Don’t give them weapon in their hands.

 

If someone knows how to use your weak spot, you will be defeated even by cowards. Also, think about other weaknesses. Just for own sake, as kind of security key, think about what kind of tool you might have for this cruel game.

Did you fall in trap of superstition?

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If we could predict our future it would be step forward. Maybe we could avoid something unpleasant and stop things which we don’t want.  How to win in this race with unpredictable life?

Fanny can’t find normal boyfriend. She is blind in this tunnel of love. Every guy she met had something what rejected her at the end. So, she was printing their photos with one purpose. She will take this photos to clairvoyant. Fanny heard about man who lives in lonely house in the village. She paid him some money to see important things from this photos.

She was disappointed with result.

– You are insecure person Fanny. You can’t decide what you want. That men are unavailable at the moment and i don’t see clear what is on their mind. Seems vibration for today are not good.

Later, Fanny met with her best friend Alice.

– Dear, why you paid him for this? I could tell you some things from cup of coffee , without money. Sometimes you are really naive.

When you are in trouble and way out doesn’t exist, you will think about high forces.

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In this situation, you are perfect victim for any kind of fraud. So called seer can convince you that you are cursed and that someone put spell on you. Also, if you are unhappy in love, seer can help you too. You will get some materials and that guy you dream every night will be yours. Just , first you need to pay some money. But, what is money in compare with eternal happiness without spell or whole life with person you love? You can give all money you have, so result will be better and better.

One day Gypsy woman said to me that she wants to read from my palm. I accepted from joke, and she asked me money. I gave her small coins to check her. Suddenly she said to me that she can’t see future with so small amount of money. She said, that i have spell and if i don’t pay bigger money, this spell will ruin my life. I knew this was scam so i just left.

Some people are indeed talented to predict future. Even FBI will ask for a help from seers and that people are professional. They will not threat to others, they will do their job and it takes lot of energy and they are exhausted from their visions.

Other people are also talented, but for fraud. They will deceive innocent victims. Man in Croatia said to woman entrepreneur that she has spell and she paid him big money to clean this curse. He gave her stinky water and some other things, and for a return, he use her for marketing of his services, and he robbed her. He got six months of prison.

When you are desperate, or in panic, don’t let your fear to take over your mind. You can get devil’s offer. This will be promise that your problems will disappear over night. Instead of this, you can have bigger problems , how to return money you lost.

You want to dig into your future? Let’s cook coffee and go to your friend or neighbor to have some fun. Maybe they can see something useful, and for sure you will not leave with empty pockets.

How publicity rape victim second time?

Topic about raping is always sensitive area. Partly, people will judge abuser, but victim will not stay untouched too. Some will wonder, did victim provoke attack? What she wore? Why she was drinking? How she behaved? Some will wonder about manipulation, and others will pity naive person.

This is one example how things went wrong. Place of event: city Zadar. Persons: five guys, one girl. All are young and they still going to high school.  Young girl were raped on the beach, since late evening until early morning. She was drunk and her memory was empty.  Her body was wounded and her mother reported this event another day.

The victim said she did not know all that guys, they just met at party, while she was drunk and vomit, so they offered taxi to drive her home. Instead of safe way home, she was raped.

Not all is so simple. When woman is raped, she will fight, bite, scratch man who force her for sex. That girl did not remember at all. Young guys used opportunity, when she was totally drunk to use her. New Criminal law in Croatia consider this criminal act as sex without acceptance. That means, if victim change her mind during sex, that is denial. Punishment for this criminal act is easier than for rape. Also, young guys were not convicted before, this is their first criminal act.

What happens if woman is not able to say no? 

For sure, it doesn’t mean acceptance. No matter, if woman is drunk, numb or retarded, if she is not able to say yes, if she is under pills or drugs, this is force. Young guys understood this as part of wild, sick game and they used opportunity. They were competition, who will do “work” on better way. Like in movie with Jodie Foster “The accused”. That girl was alone, unprotected, she wanted to have fun and she got horror story.

Now, she is exposed to be victim one more time. Court trials are painful, every law rule has hole, and no matter what will happen with this guys, she will be damaged to the rest of her life. It was bad fate or she was not careful?  Maybe her parents did not take care enough? Consequences are here, no matter what caused that event.

Law is here to protect us, police is here to make law rules real, parents are here to educate us, but we must think about our acts at first.

The point of this story is, nobody can take care of you enough if you don’t take care of yourself. You know your environment and places which are notorious on some way, you know that is not safe to walk alone in the middle of the night.

Nobody said that you are completely safe if you have boyfriend or if you don’t go out tonight, but by logic, chances to be in danger are smaller if you are not alone. It is like in jungle, lion will stalk fove when she walks alone in free space. After that lion will tear weak animal on pieces.

That is what that guys did, they drag this girl alone in the car. The rest was history. Consequences will stay even it supposed to be just one night for party.

Too much love can kill you

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Shakespeare has written Othello, story about jealousy where poor Desdemona were strangled. Iago, friend of Othello, made intrigue to convince Othello that Desdemona is cheating him. Othello did not thinking, he just choose to punish her even she was innocent, so he killed her with own hands.

Jealousy is very hard feeling, consequences are that we speak before we think , we act before we speak.

What happened in Croatia, in small city named Vojnić, is terrible tragedy caused by jealousy.

Shortly, girl Victoria was with 3 guys in relations, one by one. Dejan, Alvin and Boško liked/loved the same fatal girl. One night Victoria came in front of nightclub “Heart “with present boyfriend Boško. He stabbed Alvin and Dejan, he cut Alvin throat, and stabbed Dejan in the heart with knife. Also he wounded bodyguard in the nightclub, and then bodyguard caught him. Two young guys are dead as results of this action. Boško can get biggest punishment, in Croatia is the biggest punishment for murder on cruel way, 40 years of prison. Forums and social networks talk about Victoria , some people blamed her because they think she was playing with guys, but there is no purpose, two young guys are dead.

The main fact is, they all were so young. Victoria has 18 ages, guys were in twenties. This wonderful time of youth is ruined now.

Sources say that Boško was treating in social networks in his statuses, that this murder were planned indeed.

What can jealousy do to people? Jealous person want someone for himself, he doesn’t want to share, he wish to owe the person. Extreme form of jealousy is possession.  This is situation when you want to make prison for your partner that nobody see him, control him in every moment and cut every form of freedom. If person did not make obligation to you, if she is in dilemma , is that normal way, to kill someone? After all, if you destroy one life, it can’t belong to anyone more, even to you.

True love depends about freedom of choice, maturity and ability to make decision. Mature lovers will accept breakup and word NO. Immature couples will get revenge which might finish as tragedy.

Young people are collecting experience, they don’t want obligations, they need freedom, passion, and it is nice to be young and furious for them.

As James Dean said “live fast die young”.  After it happens it is late to correct mistakes, even it happened in the name of love.

 

Do we underestimate bullying?

When Paula had 13th birthday, she went at school with concern. Some guys in her class did not like her, and teacher had no understanding for her problems. She was victim of bullying and all what she could do is to wait 2 years until she finish elementary school. Then she will not see that flock anymore. Her doubts were true, so when guys found out about birthday, they start to provoke her. When she replied in the same ugly way, they start to beat her with fists and she was crying. Guys were enough wise not to leave big wounds, only few scratches. Nobody in class wanted to involve, they stayed away. It was her worst birthday, she went home humiliated. Her mother was in school another day, and teacher said that is normal situation between children in this period. She asked her mother also why Paula’s hands are shaking, that she should feel safe between her friends in classroom and that she is too shy.

As adult woman, Paula doesn’t trust to men. She thinks in two directions: men wants to use her for sex or they want to hurt her. This perception comes out from school days, because every time she meets man, voices in her head scream to alert. She had many sexual adventures, because she thinks she deserve to be humiliated. As consequences of bullying, victims could be promiscuous or totally closed for sex experiences. Paula was promiscuous woman.

Bullying is as an octopus. 

It grows on all sides, and it develops in many phases. 

Other students start to tease victim.

When victim answers on violence, it become worse.

Little jokes can turn into aggression, with physical wounds and scarves.

In the case of silence, bullying will continue because there is no authorities to stand on its way.

Once when it finish, consequences will stay. Victim of bullying will have distorted perception about people.

In american movie “Bully”, based on true event in year 1993,  guy was violent student Bobby Kent who did aggression to his friends and girlfriend, he took power to rape, beat and abuse everyone on his way. This damaged group of kids made deal to hire hitman and they killed Bobby together.  Main killer, Marty Puccio Jr. got death penalty, which was later turn into life prison, without possibility of abolition. The others finished in jail with different punishments.

It is better to stop and prevent, than to deal with terrible damage later.

Why this happens and why some children are victims, and others are bullies?

 

Profile of  victim:

different than others, usually introvert

– person with poor social status or with some physical disadvantages

– someone who is talented or geek

– person who avoid big groups and usually read lot of books

– someone with unusual ideas, outsider

Profile of bully:

violent person

– egomaniac

– control freak

– person with good financial status

– person who is popular at school

This things are happening everywhere. In ex Yugoslavia, schools did not have even psychologists. It was wasting of time to talk with immature children about violence, and headmaster was main boss, to solve mess in school. When some wild child created mess, it was enough to slap him, and things were finished. Nowadays, bullying became worse, because here are social networks, cell phones and these are dangerous tools to ruin someone’s life. One photo with teenage girl in bra is enough to ruin her life.

As long are people on this Earth, here will be jealousy, envy and hate. Hate starts in childhood and develops in high school. Bullying is the worst follower of hate. Cut this roots.

Filthy face of money

 

Who sits at two chairs, usually falls down on butt. Sometimes we are undecided, unstable and we don’t know what we want, so this is natural process. We can mistake in this situation, when both solutions are attractive and we would like to have all, but we can’t . Imagine woman who must decide between two lovers, even she loves husband and lover, she can lose both. Or, if you are friend with people who can’t stand each other, and one of them hurt other, so you must choose which side you will take. So you still sit on two chairs because decision is tough.
The other pair of this problem is sitting on two chairs with purpose, when you realize that you have benefits from both sides.

That is politicians tool, when politician is flexible in many political groups. Simply, when one government fall , he will get position in other. Democrat, socialist or liberal, what is the matter? He will follow the wind, in which direction wind blows. The same is with singers who are on some way connected with politicians, especially in the election time. They will support those who will pay more, no matter about their beliefs.

Lepa Brena was famous folk singer in ex Yugoslavia, the most famous woman who were singing in Balkan area. She had concerts in Sofia in Bulgaria where she came with helicopter. Her movie “Let we love each other” was very popular, even her music was trashy and without artistic values, and her image was cheap, so i believe that many fashion gurus would spit on her clothes and fashion style. Later she got married for tennis star Slobodan Živojinović and during years, she became rich woman with own music production.
Recently people in my city wanted to give her street, in her honor. She had supporters and enemies, because indeed she is woman as chameleon, able to survive in every situation. During terrible war in Bosnia, Brena had cover photo with military clothes. She was wearing chetnick blouse on the cover of magazine. She justified this as she was protecting her parents and sister, who were prisoners under occupation of her city Brčko. Chetnicks are terroristic group who were killing innocent people in Croatia and Bosnia, war criminals with bloody hands.
Recently, Lepa Brena made big concert near my city and she raise the dust, because we all know very well that some of our neighbors and citizens were victims during chetnicks attack. Singer who wears chetnick blouse is suddenly heroine who deserves street in her dedication? I don’t think so.
Accord my opinion her music is cheap, without values , she is now old woman over 50 and not popular as she used to be in the past, but all this doesn’t matter. The matter is, until when we will judge people as footballer Joe Šimunić, who were punished by UEFA and FIFA because of historical greeting “For home we are ready”, which was declared as ustasha message, and besides us, ex Croatian minister of sport reported Joe to high instances? Who will report Brena, because her blouse insults national feelings and she made concert on places where innocent people were killed by the people who wear the same military labels?

That is not joke. We Croats, we are sometimes too soft. We forget and quick judge our singer Thompson, we forbid his concerts because he sing about war in Croatia, and he is considered as violent?

If we are quick to judge, to report or to blame because Croatia is considered sometimes as notorious country where young people celebrate ustashas, what is with people like Brena then?

We might put their names as titles on the street, because they were sexy singers once in the past, or because they have expert skills of sitting on two chairs?