If it is not on Internet, it never happened

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If it is not on Internet, this event never happened. If you travel somewhere, celebrate anniversary with husband, celebrate birthday, put your photos that whole world see this. Otherwise, your life does not exist.
I remember when i opened my sister’s diary and found something fishy, and later she got angry at me. Nowadays, when you open someone’s Facebook and find something fishy, person will get angry cause you did not press like or make comment.
I noticed that people forgot difference between secret and private.
Oh, you are married? I did not know that. It has been two years since i got married and some people at my workplace still questioning how i changed my surname. No, i did not share photos at my official e-mail, i did not bring cakes from wedding, i don’t talk about mother in law when i wait lunch at business restaurant. Simply, i think, this is my business. It is not their business, and at least it is not Internet business.
How many times i saw private talk on public statuses, husband and wife who are arguing in front of their thousand friends, photos of their children and kitchen? Once woman from Venezuela wanted to share photos of her family in tag, in my page. I said her, i have my life, and this is my website, with all respect, keep photos of your family for your close friends. I don’t want to see it. I am not jealous, envious or rude, i just have my boundaries, and i don’t need photos of your son who is playing in the mud with other children.
The best marriages and relations were made in silence. It is not kind of silence where you hide your partner. It is kind of silence where you don’t talk about your conflicts in public, where you don’t notify your friends about your private details and when you have this happy smile on your face because you put your privacy under lock.
Once i read about tennis couple , Andre Agassi and Steffi Graf, who were always private couple. They were not jumping out with every photo of their kids, with every kiss and hug. Or to made porno video, as Kim Kardashian, to earn money from this.
The meaning of love is sacred. If i had conflict with my husband, this is between me and him. We will sit and talk, we will cry or scream, we will make peace. I never wanted to hear public advices as “He is not worthy of you, find better ” or “This is not good for you, i feel this. “
People are not always trustful. Many of them will celebrate your fall or they will not care. People love drama, but not because they wish to participate, they wish to have fun and gossip. If you give them gossip material, they will laugh to you under your back.
One Friday evening my neighbors had terrible fight. Woman was crying, her husband was yelling and they smashed something, i don’t know, i heard noise. When i saw that man few days later, i just said hello. I did not ask him about noise, crying or drama. It is his personal thing. As my husband said: “If he falls on our balcony,  we will call police.”
Technology progress did not give us much private space. We see other’s underwear, dirty socks, untidy rooms, unhealthy food. We see fat women who wish to be x plus models cause this is popular. We see even scenes from other’s funerals.
I always support curtains over private life. What is between two people is not show for audience. People are not paying my bills neither sleeping with me, so that is my right.
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Do you recognize rejection from cold-warm strategy in romance? (for men)

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Role of hunter is not grateful position. Men are by nature leaders, and from them is expected to do first steps. Especially, if they wish to get certain woman, they must be ready for everything, from gentle rejection until harsh kick in the butt. As much real man will take leash in his hands, he will also know when to back off, and when is time to stop with his attempts.

Unfortunately, some guys are not so wise to recognize real rejection from warm-cold strategy. This is also women fault, so women will play and make fool of men in some situations.

How to separate real rejection from warm-cold strategy?

If woman is interested for you, and she is not yet sure, she will give double signs.

She will say no if you invite her for date, but her next sentence will be : “Maybe next time, i will let you know.”

She will let you to follow her into her street, but she will not invite you in her flat.

She will talk with you, but you will not get permission to kiss her.

She will even sleep with you, but next day she will be unavailable.

She will delete you from Facebook but she will not block your page. Just , for any case, she may expect your message.

If woman is not interested for you, she will not give you any chance to repeat your questions about her and you.

If you call her, she will block your number.

If you send her message, she will block your page.

Follow her, she will call her friends for help. 

She will appear with another man in front of your eyes if you are annoying. This is very clear sign.

If you try to kiss her, she will push you away. Alert, here you are in danger zone. She can slap you.

Some men are not gentlemen and they don’t accept other choices. Real gentleman will accept word no with silence and dignity. This man will not make you troubles. Also, you might sorry because he will never disturb you later. He asked you once , you denied, and he gone. Your problem is another man, called jerk. Jerk will chase you and spread gossips. Jerk will tell you that you are whore, fat or short, and that you are ugly. All because you did not want to date with him.

The worst follower of rejection is denial. If you deny to yourself that person rejected you, if you repeat her words and ask some hidden meaning, you are on wrong path. Some guys think : “She said no? Maybe she is shy? Or her friends talked bad about me? Maybe she is not ready today, but i can wait. ”

Delusional guys are often jerks. They can’t admit to themselves that some women don’t accept them. They must learn how to accept negative answers. Until then, such men will hunt in blurry zone.

How people lie at first date?

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Truth is naked, and lies are well dressed. Do we always want to hear naked truth, without imagination, just straight into face?

There are so called white lies, sweet ways to avoid truth or to make truth more beautiful, with some updates.

Men and women use different lies. When we start to know special person, we want to expose ourselves in best edition.

Men wish to expose themselves as brave heroes, rich entrepreneurs or candidate for stable relation, so they add some stories to their CV.

 

Men will say:

 

1. i have fast car

 

2. i have well paid job and good education from university

 

3. i was with many women, all were crazy for me, but you are special

 

4. i travel around world

 

5. i have very good business connection, my boss indeed eat from my hands

6. i broke teeth of some bad guys

What is the truth?

 

1. i stuck between credits for my car and house, i will be without money soon

2. i hate my job but i need it to survive

3. i am looser because all my ex broke up with me, or i don’t have much experience in love, i am virgin, i had only 2 women in my life etc.

4. i was never outside of my country

5. really i am intruder and nobody at my work don’t even notice me

6. i runaway from hooligans

 

So, if you had first date, what would you prefer? To know naked truth about guy who is indeed looser, or sweet lies ? That guy must have good insurance that you will wish to see him again.

 

Well he lies about his car, about his salary, maybe even about size of his penis and his skills in bed. But maybe you will found out that he is creative and able to deal with every situation, so it will be your challenge. On other hand, guy who represent himself as looser will be denied on first step. Imagine you met guy who says :”I live with my mother , she is retired and paralyzed and she gives me money for survival, i had no sexual experience during 3 years, and i am dying to see you again.”

 

Nobody likes despair, so it will be turn off. Real truth is somewhere in the middle. We women are asking for potential, ambitious guy who will show courage to deal with hard reality. Even we can forgive him lies later if he is able to change his present life.

 

Women like to represent themselves as pure so they will lie about number of sex partners. Also they will lie about ages, natural look and relations.

How women say lies?

 

1. i had sex only with one guy 

 

2. i am 20 or 25 year old (in fact 30-40)

 

3. my color of hair is natural

 

4. i don’t use much makeup

 

5. lies about weight and height are also on the top, high heels and belly belt will do good  deception , so woman can look slimmer or taller

6. i rejected many guys cause i am picky


What is the truth?


1. i slept with few guys before you

2. i am not so young

3. my hairdresser is responsible for my styling

4.  i will not get out from house without lipstick

5. i was on many diets

6. there is a long time since someone invited me at date

Women will lie with clothes, makeup, even with tears. What would guys prefer? To see woman without makeup on first date, without fancy clothes, and that she admit to him her sexual experience? “Yes, i slept with two best friends, i had few one night stands, but that is a life.”

 

Men doesn’t want to get rid of his vision about innocent women so fast. They want sleeping beauty from fairy tales, and later she can expose her real truth.

So, yes, truth is honest , but lies are here to protect us – at least at the beginning.

Life in blog sphere

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“How is it going on blog? Are you earning a lot? ” My friend asked me this before a long time, and said also : “I would like to write blog, too. “

I did not want to discourage her and break her illusions. Writing blog is not simple how it looks. Mostly, people live in dreams that they will be popular over night and that they will learn a lot of money.

If someone ask me how much i earn, i will frankly say : nothing. I did not want to pay domain which is too expensive , to monetize my blog. I have regular job and i have no time to visit many blogs and to pull people on the sleeves. I gave them freedom to read me if they like my posts. Also, i don’t let people to promote themselves on my blog page. I think everyone should pay promotion if they wish.

I am person who will never pretend. If i comment your content, it means i really like this. I am not person who will put thousand likes on your post and then say : “Wow, now look at my blog. ” This is old trick, we all know that such “admiration” indeed means that i did not read your content and that i only wanted to be noticed.

Another thing which every beginner at blog afraid are haters. Well, i must wake you up. There are no haters, there are only silent, ignorant people. Believe me, millions of bloggers are on Internet, and if you gain haters, it means they read you. So, you should be grateful for haters.

I want that you pay attention on chatters. Yes, that are those desperate people who come under your post, without reading it, and then comment how they spent day.  So, i had “pleasure” to read chat under my post about “man who lost his mom in storm. ” My deep condolence, but i am not so merciful that i will let therapy under my blog post. This is not place for this, and yes, therapists are well paid.

Also, don’t listen to people who try to make you guilty. “Oh, you are so rude. Why we can’t post links under your blog. We are all equal here. ” No, equity and equality are two different things. I did not give you permission to post your links, but i did not do the same at your blog. How would you feel in the case if i post about football under your religious post? Because, i am big football fan, i will post about Neymar and Messi under your prayers, because we are all equal?

Now, it is not all black, so i must say thanks to some sincere people who got my posts serious and inspired me with their stories. So, if i post story about broken heart, and you write about partner who left you, you are welcome. Why not to share your story (without link, of course). I am happy if my post wake up your memories, if my post made you smile or if you are wondering about your feelings.

In blog sphere everyone can find smart people who are very friendly. They will offer you page to share your links and to follow each other. I will do it when it comes time.

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Here is something what i very like to use, spam tool. When i see that comment is out of topic, i simple open trash box. Yes, you can write critics, but you can’t go out of topics or invite me to use some pages which will bring me viruses. I love my computers and phone, enough not to open it.

Blogging is bloody work. Some people will try to educate you, to preach you, to mock you, others will just ignore you or try to spam your page. This is all in human nature, to compete, to play , to annoy. I understand even this, some people are so lonely that they don’t make difference between blog and inbox, between internet and reality.

I believe everyone of you met with boring neighbor who knock at your door even you did not invite him or her, who sat at your table even you just came from work or who is here to ask you money or thousand favors. These are some bloggers, boring neighbors.

Now after this post i will get some haters . Just kidding. 🙂

How to deal with toy boy?

 

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Playing with feelings is very cruel game. Someone loves you, and you define path of this relation. So, it means, you will reply on message when you wish, you will date with person when you wish and you will break up when you wish. This is advantage when you love less or when you don’t love at all. Women will complain on cruel men, but we also have horse for race. With years, every woman learns how to deal with players and it is not hard to become a coach.

 

Imagine that you are in life period  when you got all what you wanted. Marriage , kids, successful job , but still some things from past are unsolved and you want to heal old wounds, even to get revenge for the time when you were humiliated. Now is the right moment, because you are strong enough, you have background and little girl who cried on every harsh word died.

Roberta got married before year ago. She loves her husband but she still did not heal some bad experiences from the past. It was something what bites her inside, like injustice stands on her way to feels happy. Name of her bad experience was Jared. It was guy who was playing with her emotions, and hurt her a lot. Recently she got his message, where he wrote that he miss her. Roberta closed her eyes and imagined every passionate moment with him. Then she remembered her husband, who shown her main ingredients of love : respect and appreciation. She replied on his message with cold sentence as ” i am good and busy” and she accepted his invitation to drink coffee in coffee bar, at lunch pause . So, when she saw Jared again, she lost her focus but she did not forget all pains what he did to her. For example, his favorite fun was to flirt with her female friends and to gossip her in front of them. Roberta was listening him, his words of regret and sadness. How he wish to be a better man. After this, she spilled her coffee right into his lap. It was embarrassing, but she could not sustain smile.

Sometimes, women are in phase when they don’t know what they want.

If you decided to play, not to love, here are some candidates:

Married man who cheats his wife. 

Perfect choice for game. He will get what he asked.

Too young boy. 

Also good choice, if you are 40, and play with boy 20 or 25 years old , game could be exciting.

Man from another country.

Distance is cool reason to play, not to love.

Stranger from internet.

So many jerks from chat site are good for game.

Ex boyfriend.

If he did this too you, now is your turn.

If you are woman, be aware that rules are different than in man world. Society with judge you, friends might turn you back and men will hate you. When man is player, he is the main boss. His friends envy to him and they ask advices from him. When woman is player, she is slut. Her friends avoid her, and they gossip her too. If you have your aim, if you really don’t care what others think, choose your target.

On which way women play?

They smile to their targets and invite them on coffee.

They make love and don’t call again. If you call her, you will get excuse.

They don’t introduce toy boy to their parents and friends.

They are sometimes ashamed of their actions. 

Bad side of this strategy is that woman can fall in love in toy boy. He is sweet toy and he can make your heart melting. He might fall in love in you and you will feel as monster. In this case, you know where is your red button. Game got serious, time to let go. Sometimes, two broken souls meet and try to punish each other because they don’t know how to love again. They will play game of love with possible victims.

Don’t regret nothing after all is finished. Experience is part of love and passion. Some passionate relations are condemned on death penalty. Simply, when you destroy each other with feelings of doubts, jealousy and hatred, this can’t survive. Real love is indeed something else. There is no need for game, just loyalty and respect are mutual.

Why women like naughty guys?

 

 

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Forbidden fruit is sweeter. Grass is more green around your neighbor’s house. That is logic of some human minds. They see things what other’s have and they want to involve in this.
Such women are imitators and insecure in own choice. This is more safe, to try something what is already proved as good. Accord this logic, some women will pick only married men or men who are already taken and popular.
George is handsome man, he is working in bank, his salary is big because he is leader of one department. He is well mannered and girls love to hang out with him , at team building. Problem is, George was never in relation. Girls will say, George is wonderful, but somehow boring. There is no sparks, adrenaline, excitement with him. Girls would like to go in shopping with him, but not on date. He is not hot.
His friend Lewis is what women say hot guy. He is heartbreaker and never alone. One woman left him, he is already with another. He was married twice, and divorced. Lewis has magnet and women adore him.
If you ask women, why they pick Lewis, and not George for date, they will say that Lewis is confirmed as interesting choice. George needs good promotion and marketing, this is something what is missing in his behavior.

Women like to compete with each other. It is not rarity that two best friends will compete, they will even steal guy from each other. Married woman and his best friend, this is not always safe area when husband is here. It is like in movie “All about Eve.” Two women, one is role model for other, but indeed that friend who show admiration to you is your rival. She wants to take what is yours.

What is an advice for George? 

He needs so called hunter stories. 

He should lie about his reputation.

Women heard about him as good son of his mother, this is not cool and hot. Women tremble when they hear about Lewis, because he is so good in bed, he is passionate and this is hot area. When George is here, women will see scene with family and boring dinner. Lewis will take them in Wonderland. They can travel with him, he will suggest even roller coaster and they will feel young and desirable. George will take his woman at home, and his mother will judge them. This is what women want to avoid.

George needs woman who will break ice.

Once when other women hear that he had sex with someone, they will be curious too. Nobody wants to be his teacher.

Lewis is hunter and his trap is always full of trophies. Women will suffer and cry with him, but he will never be alone. He is enough smart to recognize when he needs to stop and settle down. Some women will reject him too, but he has joker in his pocket. As long women like to compete in this game, Lewis will be popular.
Women like naughty guys because they are unpredictable, you never know what he will bring at table. Maybe you did not want to marry with him, but for sure you want to meet some of them at least once.