Are you person without plans?

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When you see life as kind of game, you are playing as kid in the sand. Nothing is serious for you, because you are having good fun. Then, something happens and you will understand life on different way, more seriously. Now party is over and it is time to settle down.

Love also consists from phases. First guy you kissed maybe was your classmate in school and you will not remember him. Then, it was story of your life. Later you lost your virginity with cool man, and after that you found guy who wants to marry you . Now all before that became ridiculous.

Mine friends used to say such things about their former boyfriends:

“I was so stupid when i did calls every day and night. His mother knew my voice, i even talked with her.”

“I was hitchhiking just to see him, because he did not want to visit me.”

“I cut my hair because he prefers short hair.”

All that dramas were intro , because our experiences leads us to maturity. This is normal when you pass such things as teenager, and in thirties you are person who knows what she wants or she already got it.

Sometimes, life play cruel games, and some gifts which you supposed to get in certain period will skip you.

Which kind of people are immature in soul forever?

Man who did not kiss a girl, and he is already 30.

Woman who changed many men, and still she did not find right one, even she is already in certain ages.

People who live with parents after 30.

People who save their virginity even they are over 30.

Life is not pattern, and we are walkers through this path. Some women will never get married or have children, the same as same men. Nothing is guaranteed. When life skips over you, you are chosen to stay child in the heart and soul. You will see that something important miss you, and also you will try to replace this.

How to be happy when you did not get what you wished?

Travel around, you will see things which you never saw before.

Go on parties, football matches, birthdays, events. 

Make new friendships.

Find some hobbies.

Strange things happen when two people, who are somehow damaged, meet together. Charlie lived with parents even he was already 30. He had bad love experiences and also he was a virgin. His days were the same, he did not know when was Monday, and when was weekend because he was watching movies nightly and working daily. Then Victoria came to his city, as tourist, with travel agency. She wanted to know London and accidentally he met her in one museum. They started to talk about history and she invited him on coffee. He was confused, but he accepted. Victoria was divorced, 40 years, still attractive and she did not have children. She was cheerful as little girl. Charlie never laughed so much, they continued contact over internet when she left in her country. They were two lost souls , victims in life who skipped them. In the moment they are talking about future, how to be together , because they recognized each other.

When life pass over you, clap your hands and don’t give up to be noticed by life. Some people carry bigger burden than others. Accept this as sign that you are not ordinary. Maybe you don’t have husband or children, but you were on places where others will never be and you did things which others will never do. Life gifts are not the same for everybody. Some have different package. You are just one of the people without plans.

Where is conflict zone in common life?

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Even most compatible couples will have conflicts. Small fights and discussions are part of life, especially when you share your space with someone. Who can handle years of life in common without arguments? Every conflict is indeed test for couples.

Small conflicts are constructive. You will say what is bothering you, he will say his opinion and you can met on half way. Also it can make your relation spicy and more exciting. You are fighting, soon you will kiss and make love with him. Sounds like in romantic movie.

What are most often subjects of conflicts between couples?

His or her parents. You can’t stand his annoying mother, she brings lunch every time she visit you, like you don’t have idea about cooking. Last time, when she went, you throw her meal into garbage. He can’t stand your bossy father, this man knows the best about everything, from football until how to paint wall.

Sex. You have headache, he is horny. He is busy, and you want to make love. How to find common language between sheets?

House work. Who will wash dishes, and who will make lunch? Why your man is so untidy, that you jump over his socks and shirts which are on the floor? Why your woman use bathroom as space for her makeover? When she will cook something tasty?

Friends. You don’t like her best friend. That woman is barking as dog. She come to drink cup of coffee and you must watch and listen her gossips whole afternoon. You don’t like his pals too. His friends are drinking buddies, they will drag your husband in striptease club and he will back drunk.

Television. Oh, why he must watch this Hustler every time? Why she is hanging on 24 Kitchen? And that stupid programs about baseball and handball? Who is watching this anyway? He can’t stand Oprah.

Kids. If you have children, you will argue about their behavior and education. Who knows the best? You think you must be gentle and soft with children. He thinks that paddle comes out from paradise. Why not to yell on your daughter? She needs to learn about respect.

Money. If you both earn money, you will pay your bills together. If you don’t have job, you are into problems. Every partner will complain after some time. What, i will work for you and your expenses? No way. I paid this phone bill, to whom are you talking so much? Did you call hot line? I know you called your auntie in Australia. I will not work for your barking on the phone.

Love relation is big complex, and lot of things must work out to be successful. This is like an orchestra. All instruments must sound good. If not, you will have incredible noise, and you will get out. You live with your love, and you can’t work by your own. No, you are not alone when you take decisions. Ask your partner for opinion and make a deal. That will be beautiful melody, you created this together.

5 signs that your friend is a mole

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Word friendship is overrated. If you are naive, easy going person, you will call everyone your friend. There is classification, in which cases someone grows enough to be your friend.
1 level : acquaintance – person you met recently, and you like it at first sight
 
2 level : colleague – person who works with you, but you don’t know nothing at first sight about him
 
3 level : roommate – someone who lives with you by certain circumstances, if you are in dorm or rented flat, someone you share office because you work together
 
4 level :  friend, because you both want it
 
5 level : best friend, someone you can trust more than others
People often mix friendship with rivality. Rival or competitor is person who pretends friendship with you, but indeed she wants to compete with you and to do everything better than you. The trouble is, if you are better in some area, person will show envy and jealousy . She will try to sabotage you, and having such person in your circle is similar as you live with mole in your garden. So, here is flowers and green grass, but somehow it doesn’t smell like you expect. Something ruins that flowers.
As example of real rivality i will mention girl i knew before many years. Recently she met my mother and asked for me, even we did not see each other 15 years. Still, she wanted to know details about me, my partner, my job and what is going on. When we were friends, she was always comparing herself with me. If some guy would be interested for me, she would say : “He was flirting with me too. ”  If someone talked bad about me, she would pass me information with apology that she sorry for hear this. If she heard something good, she would make it as meaningless information. We broke our friendship when i realized that i don’t need this in my life. I had more respectful enemies, at least they did not pretend that they like me.
Even you maybe think that someone is your good friend, circumstances will show different view.
You will see is this connection between you and x person rivality or real friendship.
 
 
Your friend is close with your enemy. 
Ok, we have choice to whom we will talk, but if your friend spend more time with person who hurts you than with you, think about friendship.
Your friend is too spontaneous in company of your boyfriend.
If your friend wants to hug and kiss your boyfriend, and she says that she do this because of some “brotherly love”, think about real motives.
Your friend always forward you gossips.
“She talked bad about you. He laughed to you. I heard he doesn’t like you. ” Ok, it is not bad to know what others think about you, but if your friend constantly forward gossips, she maybe enjoys to make you sad.
Your friend is not here when you need him. Never.
Friendship is alley with two sides. You will do him favor, he will do it for you. Well, if you constantly give, and never take, if he is making excuses why he can’t help you, this is not real friendship.
Your friend is not happy when you are happy. 
More, he ask some tiny things to make your happiness smaller. For example, you got job in another city, and he says : “You will be so tired, by travelling every day. “
Moles are animals which do damage. Mole is symbol of cracked, ruined friendship, because someone doesn’t like you as you thought. Be careful when you deal with mole, because on long terms, this friendship is much worse than war with enemy.
With enemy, you know clear that he doesn’t like you. Mole will make your sight foggy, and you can get lost in this blind alley.

Can you introduce yourself as black sheep?

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Society is covered by rules. Don’t do this, be careful with this, you should not do this. Conformists will follow this rules without complaining because they need this as orientation. This is like compass for them, how to behave if you don’t write tips. They would be lost.

An opposite, rebels make own rules which are not in harmony with rules of society. It doesn’t mean that rebels will behave against law, they will simply not fit in .

It was end of school year and children in class decided about celebration. In former Yugoslavia, all parties were with folk music, and singers as Lepa Brena were very popular. Everybody in class accepted to make celebration with bellows, but Maja said no. Sound of bellows was awful for her ears. She did not come that day in school, simply she stayed at home. They said to her that she is an awesome sausage, in Yugoslavia it was symbol for black sheep.

Maja was fan of Metallica and she stayed by her taste and attitude. Her friends were gossiped her, but she did not care.

– Why you did not come? Everybody talks about you how weird you are.

Strange, weird, odd, just some of description to mark different people. Especially in socialism, there was principle of equality. All people should be modest and equal. Just, some were more equal than others, that was real truth.

Next case happened in prom night. Sandra did not want to dance, and guys were laughing to her. Girl, and you don’t know to dance? Let me teach you. Sandra did not accept this. She simply wanted to sit and talk. Why to force her for something she did not want?

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Black sheep lives on different way.

Childhood –  i will not play with Barbie dolls because i don’t like them

Youth – i will not smoke, drink or have sex because everyone else do this

Maturity – i will not listen my boss because i have right to ask other opinions or i have my ideas

Old age – i am not sick so i don’t want to go to medical center

If you are black sheep, you are not sensitive on critics, you don’t have much friends , but you have the biggest choice. Be sure, others are envious and jealous because you have guts. You paid your price, but you got an award, to authorize your personality as brand.

Put your lover on lice

You love him, but you are not sure on his feelings? He likes you, but words “i love you” are not on his mouth?

Love is not always mutual and balanced. We can meet some persons who will be amazing and stunning for us, but still something stops us to love them.

It is easy to have sex, but making love and sex are two different things.

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Main differences :

When you have only sex you don’t want to see this person few days, you need to be alone to clean your mind and heart, maybe you will feel guilt or shame.

 

When you make love you want to be with this person all the time, to make her happy with different things and on different ways because you shared something special together.


Having casual sex is like changing socks. One day with one partner, another day with second partner. Making love is like you buy expensive dress and you will care for this not to destroy something what is so special for you. You make love only with one person, and that person is owner of your heart.

There is an old trick how to recognize real love. Girls will often be fooled by sweet words but actions will make cold shower.

 

Some experiences.

He was great lover, it must be love. He treated my body so great, as real expert. I never enjoyed like with him. “

“We are making love every time when i see him. I think he loves me, otherwise he would not jump on me every time when we meet.”

After this.

“He did not call me, and when i called him he said that he is busy, but i saw him in coffee bar with friends two hours later.”

“I don’t know why his friends are laughing to me. How his friends know that i wear red bra and tanga?”

“He said that i must be a bitch when i enjoyed so much.”

When your relation has only one purpose, when you are not talking with partner, you don’t share nothing except passionate sex, that is not real love. You can test your partner. If sex is the only reason why he or she is calling you, then you can deny this. You will not lose nothing. Iced relation is cold weapon in this cold war.

Dominic and Marie had passionate, hot relation. She felt with him like in “Basic instinct”, just without killing. She could not reject him never. One day she found lipstick in his bathroom and she found out that he is cheating her. She did not say nothing, but when Dominic called her next time, she pretended that she is busy. Dominic did not give up so he called her again for few days. Marie opened door in provocative underwear and invited him on glass of champagne. Dominic started to kiss her, she pushed him and said to him that she is not in the mood. Then she put all cards on the desk, and Dominic was faced with the truth.

He could not say that he loves her. He was using an opportunity, but when Marie rejected him , it was not purpose for this relation anymore. She found out the truth, even on painful way.

 

If you touch partner without feelings of love, if you are just horny, this is like contact of two dead bodies. No sparks and no flame , just superficial instinct. It is alright if you have deal with your partner, but if you love, and he doesn’t love or opposite, then you have problem.

Put your lover on ice and your will know the answer.

Why relations from comfort are not good to get over someone?

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Space between breakup and new relation is still unfilled. You think about your ex, but he is not coming back and now new guy is in the game.

Sometimes we need comfort, tight hug and shoulder for crying. We are weak and savior is here to rescue us.

The problem is when we are not fall in love, we are just grateful. New guy in our life, he spread hands to catch us, he falls in love, but we are cold and unready. 

Old saying recommended : if you want to heal from previous love, find new love. Like, put new safe bandage on this wound. What if we hurt someone in this attempt to forget?

Sylvia was broken after relation with Richard. He left her because of younger woman, and she was in pieces. She did not go out for a months. Brian was beside her, to make a comfort, because he knew her from childhood, they were neighbors and he was “man for all.” She leaned on him in every trouble. She wanted human touch now, soft kisses, smiles and passion, all what she had with Richard. 

Brian loved Sylvia a long time ago, but he waited her to be single. He could not interfere in her relation, but when she had breakup he was so happy, like his deep prayers realized finally. Sylvia accepted his offer for dating, to turn this friendship into love relation. 

Soon, she acted like spoiled brat. Nothing was good enough for her. She wanted to make new Richard from Brian, he was her punching bag. When Brian said “i love you”, Sylvia replied “thank you.” She did not give love back. After some time, she make wish to spend night with Brian. She wanted sex, and Brian wanted to please her. When he started to kiss her, she pushed him away. She saw that wall , Richard face in front of them. Richard gone, but still he was in every corner of her life. 

If we did not get over previous partner, it is wrong to start something new. 


Some time of adjustment, pending phase will be more practical. Find out what makes you happy. Better buy new dress than find new partner. Clean yourself from poison inside you. If you rush in new relation , you can hurt someone who is innocent. Simply, that is chain of unhappiness and you are member of this chain. Someone hurt you, now is your turn to hurt somebody else. That someone must pay, does it matter who is he? Heart and ego must regenerate. 

You have zero situation. Now you feel even worse. You are not just a victim, you are sadist. Are you better than your former boyfriend?

Partner for comfort is not partner for love. Being someone comfort is not grateful position. You are just passenger in this relation. You are travelling with free ticket , in unknown destination. When your ship gone, you will stay alone again. 

Are you person of your ages or time pass over you?

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Everybody will remember old uncle Albert from comedy serial “Only fools and horses. ” When he started to talk about “during the war” stories, his family members were yelling “shut up Albert!”. Elders could be boring and annoying people even they are not aware of this. It doesn’t matter how old are you , the matters is your mental age. If you are old in soul, you are fossil.

Bertha and Emily are two different women. Bertha is 40, and Emily is 45. In weekend time, they talked about plans. 

Bertha said : “I will sleep all Sunday and read good book. Maybe i finish my knitting. “

Emily said: “I go to concert of Pearl Jam. Evan invited me, it will be cool night.”

Reaction of Bertha: “Aren’t you too old for this? There will be crowd, kids will push you from all sides. And that noise, omg, how can you listen this?”

Emily replied: “No i am not old, i feel very well thank you. But you are old and grumpy. “


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How can you know that people around you consider you as old zombie?

You poke your nose everywhere, teaching and preaching about everything, even you don’t know nothing about some subjects. 

When you talk, you use past time, as you have Alzheimer illness. 

“It was before twenty years. I remember you had blue suit when you proposed me.”

You are nostalgic, because, accord you, everything was better before.

You talk with other people from heights, as they are kids. 

“Oh i could be mother to you. You are still greenhorn dear.”

You are definitely not in trend. 

“What kind of song is this? This is incredible rattle. What you wear today? Oh, that skirt is too short, that makeup is for aliens, not for you.

I believe that elder people should have dignity in a way to respect other choices. If you are grumpy and you complain on everything around you, that makes you older. It doesn’t matter do you have 30 or 50 years. You are as old computer who reject new updates. You are virus , resistant on changes.

Advices from elders are useful to young people, if you use humor until you talk with them . Also, treat them with equality. Years are not guarantee of intelligence. You can be smart with 20 and other could be stupid with 50. 

Let your spirit fly out from this cage. Don’t afraid to smile and enjoy in things which are for young people. It is not forbidden to go in night club or in concert even young people are there. Wear this short skirt if you feel good in this. What others think, does it matter? 

Everyone will get old. Some people  are old all their life, others are young until the last day. Better to live few days as lion, than 100 days as sheep.

Love advices with expiration date

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Every woman was once a little girl. Naive child can swallow everything, and elders are here to teach her life lessons. That is how Nancy had distorted vision about love, when she adopted knowledge by her grandmother. Her granny lived in harmonious marriage with grandfather and they stayed together for a forty years. Nancy dreamed about such husband, who will love and respect her forever.

Above all, Nancy got next lessons:

He will love you as you are. So, you don’t need makeup and fancy clothes.

Right guy is chosen for you by destiny. His name is written in the stars.

Everybody find somebody at the end. For everyone exist someone.

Be good and listen to your husband, so he will return you on the same way.

The right one will change himself just for you.

As teenager, Nancy fall in love in Simon. She went on first date in simply shirt, without makeup and with stain on her trousers. Simon laughed so much when he saw her, and they were dating because she made him smile. But when Nancy continued to wear her casual clothes even in front of his parents, he called her messy girl. She gave him sign, that she doesn’t care for herself, so he was not obligated to care for her too.

Next boyfriend was Raphael. Nancy met him in front of night club, when she was vomit after she drink too much beer. She believed that it was hint of destiny, because he puke in another corner. Their relation was trade of alcohol and competition in sickness. When Raphael went to emergency one Saturday, Nancy realized that it is not gift of fate, it was only punishment.

When she was thirty, she got married for Paul. She was good wife, and she accepted all what Paul asked from her. He was businessman and she was constantly cooking dinners for his friends, because he wanted to introduce her as kind of Stepford wife. Always in nice skirt, with tied hair and eternal smile on her face, Nancy was his personal servant. Paul left her because of his business partner Adele, they involved during business meetings.

Now Nancy is divorced and alone. Her grandmother died a long time ago, but Nancy realized that old wisdom doesn’t work in new age. She was constantly chasing a wind, and that wind blown her into unknown direction.

She made an important conclusion, that it is not necessary to stick with someone who doesn’t want to do things for her. Love is not one sided feeling, and for mutual relation both sides are participants. It is not true that everyone will have happy end , because world is full of single people who never found their partners, because of many different reasons.

Until you are in the game, there are still chances for you. It is not the same if you spent life between personal walls or if you collect some negative experiences. Some people will finish alone, but they will have story behind themselves to talk about, to remember that once they were happy.

Granny did not tell her that she must to jump in the water if she wants to learn swimming. If you constantly use swim belt, you will never swim alone. Also, love is not fair play, and if you play accord rules and blocks, it is not guaranteed for good result. When you feel that you stuck in blind alley, change your strategy and forget all what your grandmother teach you. You are responsible for yourself and nobody else will save you, so turn your brain when your heart start to beat faster. Love through granny’s glasses looks different now days, with some updates and changes.

Do you value your special people?

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Would you trade diamond for bunch of stones? Would you trade your present girlfriend for few adventures with other women? If you can say yes, you are person who doesn’t recognize real values. Quality system is something what makes your life worthy. If you sacrifice some personal pleasures for real thing, your priorities are high and that makes you special. Quantity is just collection of numbers, no matter do you have hundred friends who doesn’t give shit for you, or you stuck into short affairs with easy women.
When Norman was little boy, he had cute parrot, as pet. That parrot died after 2 years, and parents said to him: “We will buy you new bird. ” Norman cried and he said he doesn’t want new bird, because he loved this parrot and nothing can replace her. His brother Matthew said that he wants new bird, because old one was noisy and it is not big loss, as he said, bird is bird and there is no difference. Later, that two guys found girlfriends. Norman get married fast, after college, with his girlfriend Edith, who was his love from school days. Matthew is still single, and he has instant relations, because woman is woman, and if he fails in one attempt, soon another will take her place.
Problem with people who doesn’t recognize real values is in their actions, where they unintentionally hurt others. Sometimes, such person will find valuable love or friend, but he will not recognize diamond. Another problem is, superficial people will get fooled easily.
If your life values are based on quantity, you will get next stuffs:
Many adventures with hot sex, but without love.
 
Many acquaintances, but not real friends.
 
Many invitations for party, but nobody will listen your problems because they don’t care.
 
Lot of opportunities for jobs, but without chance for permanent salary, because you have no stability to stay on one place.
Easy going life looks beautiful on first sight, but if you look under surface, there is much emptiness. This is as big box for Christmas, when you open this golden stuff, inside is just small toy or few candies. The fact is, when we appreciate real values, we will pay price. Superficial people are not ready to pay price because it takes much efforts and kind of pain. Why should he try to get this woman when she is so hard to get? Other women are in front of him , ready to jump in his lap.
Diamonds are not for everyone, some of us deserve bunch of stones because it is easier to deal with stones. You don’t have to pay much attention on them, as on diamonds. If you get bored with stones, just throw them away. Don’t regret later that you had life, but you did not live as you supposed. Game with stones is more expensive than you think.

When you fall in love in chicken man

Love stories are unpredictable, Cupid arrows hit unknown targets and in relations are possible with many various combinations. You can see people on first sight, and think: “How they finished together?” When you scratch under surface, you will understand why some couples split very fast, and why others are inseparable. 

One of bad combinations is relation between weak man and strong woman. No, i don’t think about relation between wrestler woman and man who dance ballet, i talk about their characters. It would be natural that man is firm, bold and stable, and that woman can count on him. Especially if woman is sensible, fragile and gentle lady, that kind of man would be great match for her. Sometimes, life plays cruel games, and strong woman will involve with milksop. 

If you think that this is relation where woman rule, you are wrong. This woman has many problems because such man is unstable, undecided and unable to take important decisions.

What would be milksop?

You can recognize him in few steps.

He asks from you to pay your bill when you are in coffee bar.

He expect that you drive him in your car. If he lives in another country, you should take a plane and fly to meet with him.

If his friends don’t like you, try not to upset them. They are so important to him , and their opinion can bury you.

If someone attack you, he will runaway, so you will deal with your enemy alone.

If his mother don’t like you, try to please her wishes. He is usually favorite son and masterpiece of his mother.

He is usually passive, so if you need to take decision, he will let it to you.

In such relation, woman is usually abandoned in her beliefs and she feels alone. This relation is boat, and you will drive this boat, if you quit, you will drown together with your milksop. He can disappoint you even in bed, because as real puppy he will expect that you make him horny. The best thing you can do is to wake him up. Leave him somewhere in unknown city to see will he find way out. Let he goes out with your aggressive brother or friend, to see how he can handle this.

This kind of men you can often meet in virtual world. They will create many pages , they are romantic on first sight, they use sweet words and nice approach, but if you expect action from them, you are on wrong address. They expect granny with cookies, because they are unable to do significant steps. 

What can happen to them is to meet much older woman who will be kind of mother for them. On such way they can continue with lazy life, where they don’t need to do nothing, because everything will be done for them. They need big bear who will carry them as little kids, because they are made from sensitive materials. Lioness use too much hard ways and it can ruin their peaceful life.