When you are sad and blue, everything looks hopeless. It is not pleasant to see how your dreams failed, how your love rejected you or you lost job. Feeling like loser, this is the last what anyone needs.
Sadness is part of life. It depends how we react on this. Your pride is on the floor, you need comfort but not everyone is suitable to make you comfort.
In the period of sadness you will reveal your real friends. Those are not necessary people who hug you or cry with you. Sometimes, person who looks cold and sounds rude is your best friend, but you are not able to see this , because you are too sad.
Before 13 years i broke with boyfriend. I had a friend who was my support, but somehow after conversation with her i felt like last loser on this Earth. She said to me this : “Years are passing by, and it is less and less time and opportunities. You will hardly find someone, because in this city all good are taken already. “
Suddenly, i stop being sad. That feeling of sadness vanished, i felt anger. My anger became so strong that i was furious. I felt flame of rage and i wanted to strangle her. Few years after, i was again in relation, but i was not friend with her anymore. Maybe she did not think bad, but she sounded so bad as it is my funeral. For sure, she could make speech for funerals and earn money on this.
Today i see one my friend sad and i am thinking how to help her. Would i show her bottom of sadness and losing pride? No, i don’t want this.
So i choose few strategies how to help people in sadness, even if you don’t know them well.
Don’t pity them. Don’t say pathetic things, it might make situation worse.
Don’t preach them. Nobody wants requiem when situation is tough.
Don’t say them corny things , as “life is going on” or “time heals all wounds”.
Don’t use their sad story to ask favors from them. “I know is tough, but can you do me some favor..or borrow me money?”
Don’t avoid their company, they need you the most now.
Don’t make their problems less important. Everyone has different boiling point.
The basic rule in every sad situation is to make person feel alive . If you show to people bright side of life, if you show them that they are important and dear to you, if you make them smile even in moment when they are angry, it will help.
One thing i know for sure. People will remember how you treat them when they felt like shit. They will remember who turned them back and who gave them hand. This is the point of friendship, that you will not escape like rat from sinking ship, you will stay even on Titanic, because this is your friend.