Are you cautious person?

When you get burn, you will blow on cold. Bad experience is alert, and your red alarm will open light anytime when troubles are on the way. This is kind of warning, don’t repeat the same mistakes again. Even repeating is mother of knowledge, if we stuck in the same traps, we are wasting our time. How do you feel screwed from the same person or with same situations again? Like fool.

Roxanne learnt from past experiences. She had violent boyfriend and her blue eye or broken nose were reminders. Many time she justified how she hit into door or how clumsy she was , but once when she get out from this, apologies were unnecessary. Her next boyfriend try to hit her during conflict, and she left him another day.

Somehow, when we pass through boomer situations, next similar event will cause our flash back. I was hitchhiking and i had unpleasant experience, so there is no chance that i would do it again. It was before 10 years or more, and i surprise to myself how i was brave or foolish. Then i lost fear, but now i got warning. This happen in maturity, when you start to feel that is not recommended to put yourself into troubles, if there is easier way to solve problems.  Playing role of hero is not always brave act, sometimes is stupid. If you see that two men are in street fight, will you involve into this if you don’t know them? If you don’t want to be damaged, better not.

When we are careful, we will protect ourselves.

What does it mean?

Sometimes you will refuse to help your friend because it is against your interests.

Sometimes you will not give second chance to people who hurt you already.

Sometimes you will give up from some opportunity, for the sake of someone else. You like this guy, but you are not single so you will not accept his invite for dating.

 

When you are careful, it doesn’t mean that you afraid of risk or that you are closed in the box. Simply, you need time to think about and reconsider this offer. If you think that is smarter to stay away, do it. People can say : “You are coward.” That is not true. For example, i don’t want to travel alone in foreign country to meet with stranger who invite me from internet. I am just careful.

Some battles are not worthy of fight, others need time and adjustments, and sometimes is the biggest victory to stay calm until storm pass. That is difference between childish behavior and maturity. Kids never think about consequences, and mature persons will have kind of Libra, to think about good and bad sides of the same situation.

If we accept everything what this life offers, it is like we are walking around with binding eyes. We can crash with bad people if we act like blind mouses. Careless person is like bat, flying around until she hit into wall.

Our inside alarm should be always turn on. Look at this red button , this is your alert, that you are not doing something right.

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Do you believe in love at first sight?

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She is very nervous because she has an appointment. She is walking fast and suddenly someone is on her way. What is even worse, coffee to go is in her hands. Suddenly here is crash, her head hit into head of handsome guy. She wanted to kill him, but their eyes met and that is the beginning of love story.

Such stories we can see in romantic movies. Love at first sight is connection between two strangers. It happens on way that sparks appear between them in one moment, even they never met before.

What is truth, and what is only legend in love at first sight? First, can we tell that we immediately love someone we recently met?

Eye contact can produce sparks, and if person of opposite gender is staring at you longer than is polite, you got new fan. There is statistic, you have four minutes to develop conversation between you and desirable person. If that conversation is short and if you need to drag words from his/her mouth, that person is not interested.

Women like to believe at love in first sight.

Why is this fairy tale so popular? 

Here are some reasons:

You don’t make much efforts to search for ideal partner. There is no need for calling, stalking, spy on him on internet or clubs or at workplace. He will just come one day in front of your nose.

Your love is written in the stars. So, just wait, it will for sure happen because that is destiny.

Your pride and ego are safe. Now is no need that you beg your friend to introduce you to someone, don’t need to ask phone number or to seduce guys with your short skirt or smell of perfume. He will come to you anyway.

You have good reason to be unavailable to anyone else. Now you are waiting your Prince charming , and everyone else has no chance. He will be recognized in your eyes.

Love at first sight is easy going event. No need for any obstacles, all will be perfect, you just relax and wait. What is indeed true?

 

 

You can feel physical attraction on first sight and there are many people who had sex for one night. This is energy, you want to do it. You simply like that person so you feel free to suggest that.

Real love will never develop for few minutes or for a short time. That is just good start, intro in something good to happen later. What will be next is not so predictable. You kissed him and that kisses were unforgettable, but will he call you again? How can you be sure that your meeting was so fatal that he will call you tomorrow?

In real love, we can’t be sure how this story will develop later. But, we will take a risk because person is worthy of try. Love is kind of silent deal, we will continue this, so let’s see about future. That is why is connection at first sight good kind of intro. You skipped all annoying procedures and now when you got certain signs, that is motivation for next chapter.

Some my friends said that in the start all was beautiful, and things went on wrong path later. How is it possible that prince “loved” you so much in first date, and later he chilled out? Love can’t fade over night, so we need to learn how to read between lines.

This feeling is similar as you were drunk. You will have dizziness, your face will blush, heart will skip a beat, and your voice will tremble. That is first love attack, it hits very strong. Later, things will change. After some time you will know is this real or not.

Don’t be so disappointed if things will not go as you expected. That is kind of carnival. Beautiful masks and dance, after people show real faces. Some are pleasant and beautiful , some are ugly. That is reality. So, when you catch some eyes on you, enjoy until it last and be ready for all options.

Nostalgia is seductive liar

It was better before. I remember how we had fun and smile. These times will never come back.

If you use any of this sentences, it means you are nostalgic. You regret for past times and you want jump into time machine to be there again.

 

Usually, people became nostalgic by ages. When someone can’t fit in new trends or changes, result will be flashback. Often we can heard from elder people how much they were respected before. Also, if old woman look into her photo album, she will say : ” I was so beautiful, look at me now.”

Nostalgia is delusional feeling. It is not true that it was better before, maybe is easier to remember something what made you smile, to handle daily routine on better way. Indeed, people who live in the past are not progressing.

The main question about nostalgia is: “If that time was so awesome, why it did not continue?” 

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This is the same feeling as when you had breakup with your love. You remember her smile and her long hair, mutual jokes and how you woke up every morning with her. This past movie is spinning in front of your eyes. Your memories are so alive that it causes tears in your eyes. You remember how that guy kissed you and gave you surprises for your birthday, how you fed swans with him and this made you sad.

Nostalgia is a liar. You remember good things and forget bad. If you live in past, you stuck on sweet memories. Did you forget how that girl spent all your money without your knowledge about it? You don’t remember when this sweet guy cheated you?

Nostalgia appears in bad circumstances. 

So, now i feel bad and i will regret for past times. It can make situation worse. Let’s look better into future. Past is black, present is grey, but maybe future is pink. Remove this grey curtain of nostalgia, your view is too foggy.

This is your race, don’t forget to participate

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Do you ever get tired to do things for someone who will hardly move little finger for you? Are you tired to chase dream which is unreachable? Are you tired to deal with problems which are bigger and bigger every day?

Sometimes, life is a tunnel which is so dark that we can’t see path. We are walking as blind trying to find where is a little ray of light. As much we are trying, it is getting darker. People are deaf at your requests and even the closest one will not understand you.

This make me question, what i have in myself that everything is so hard to reach for me? Others solve problems easily and i am torching with it. I invest a lot, and i get so little. If i were farmer, i would spend a lot of seed and at the end i would sow some grass in best case.

I am trying to understand life, why i have so weak cards in this game and why i have to deal with so much obstacles for small results? Maybe i pay some bad karma or i am ungrateful for things i already have.

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As i am kind of fanatic, i don’t want to give up from my aim, so i use my extra bonus sources.

I find inspiration in those who succeed.

I make humor from my problems.

I got rid of everything and everyone who slow down my progress.

I look forward for every new day as possibility.

I remember things which were impossible for me, but i reach them anyway.

I look at life as on race in roller coaster. We go up and down and abyss is near , and i can fall in this abyss or hold on so strong that i can’t fall down. I live for triumph , for achievement. One of my favorite quotes said “those who will not risk, never drink champagne”, and i want to hold glass of champagne high to make cheers and toast .

Aren’t we live and suffer for those moment which makes us happy? No matter is this new love, birth of child, new job or lottery won? When you get your achievement, you forgot hard road with stones, wounds and lost nerves. No pain, no gain, even sometimes there is a pain and also no gain. The point is in possibility, if you never try, you will never have chance even to participate in the race.

Status: bachelor

Magic of love connected them in few moments. Sparks are around this couple, and she felt that is time to settle down. She asked him important question: “Would you like to marry with me?”

Suddenly, fire balls stop to spread lights, and everything turn into ash. He is numb, because he has no answer on this question. If he accepts, he will sacrifice his sexual life forever. If he says NO, this gorgeous woman will be hurt. So he decided for diplomatic answer : “I am not ready to get marry yet. ” She heard only word “yet” and this was another flame to warm up her hope.

Bachelors are type of men who think that time is limitless. It is alright to be bachelor in 25, but what is in 35, 45, or even 55 year? Young guys, who just step up into this life are joking about marriage. They are cheerful because they grab every chance to please their wishes and satisfaction is in status single. As long you are single, or at least you are not officially married, all paradise is in front of you.

What are misleads about bachelor status?

I always have time. Life is indeed short.

I did not find right woman to get marry. She is maybe in front of your nose, but you don’t see it.

I will not have any obligations. Yes, you will, just you will wash and ironing your clothes alone. Or with a help of your mother, who is getting older every day.

I don’t want to spend my money on wife and children. Even worse, you will spend money on alcohol, gambling and lot of activities because you are getting bored.

I will always have lot of friends. Wrong. Your friends are getting married, every day you will have less and less free guys to have party with them.

When i will have 50, young gorgeous woman is waiting for me. Women are not stupid and also we have taste. If man is not extremely rich , women will not even look at him.

The main difference between single woman (or unmarried) and bachelor is in attitude of society. Unmarried woman is woman with deadline. She is not so desirable, if she is already 30 or 40. Her time for having children is passing, her body is not perfect, wrinkles are here and her circle of fans is getting smaller. Bachelor is more desirable. He is now more mature, he is earning his own money, he has flat and now he needs only future wife. Business circles will ask for status, because married businessman is better candidate than single man. Politicians will ask for family man with obligations. Also, magazines will have list of handsome bachelors, as opportunities for women.

It is very interesting how society will label man as bachelor, even he is in relation or in cohabitation. Only formal paper means that man is out of this race.

Recently, yellow press wrote about George Clooney who finally engaged with woman lawyer, so she was marked as woman who caught him. They said, she was unavailable to him and he fall on old trick.

What is a recipe to catch bachelor? 

Universal recipe doesn’t exist. That is man decision. He wants you or he doesn’t want you. You can use some old tricks, but finally choice is his. Celebrities have much bigger choice and they will be more hard to get. Ordinary men will try to find woman accord their standards. There is one fact, some men will never get married. Simply, they did not feel they are ready on time, and time passed so they are still alone. One thing is sure, if you feel that you are bachelor , tell it to your woman, she deserve to know the truth. Give her time to find someone who is ready to settle down.

Don’t be delusional about breakups

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Breakups, we all know everything about it. Someone kick you out from his life or you cut off someone from your life. That should be the end, isn’t it? Can you break up after break up? Like you bury the same dead man twice.

 

Abandoned person sometimes live in illusion that everything will again be the same. The worst part of this sad story is denial. What if person can’t let you go? Here comes the situation when you are smiling again, breath again without rock in your lungs, when you can walk without chains in your feet.  Suddenly, he appears again in every corner.

Even when he found someone else, he says “she is not like you, it is not the same”, but he doesn’t want to admit that he did wrong thing , he has no courage to start it again. He wants to sit on two chairs. One chair is safe, this sweet girl who will care for him and wipe his ass, and the other, this is you, the other who were challenge for him and he could not forget.

 

One of excuses is that you don’t fit into his life. You are not appropriate. I think that every guy who choose girl by his conscience, to please society, is very unhappy guy. When heart made choice, it will accept only one person as loving one.

World is full of people who got married because it was practical idea, it was wish of his mother, society or financial agreement. Who cares for the heart?

 

That kind of losers wants to have both, wild mistress and cute wife, so that they can please their wishes on both side.

 

I believe in old truth about love. The one who loves you truly will never stop loving you because of some interest, because it was not good time or his nerves were broken.

Love doesn’t recognize excuses, apologies, terms. You love or you not love. Every other feeling might be sorrow for something you missed, desire, unfilled dream.

So be careful when you love, and don’t make yourself or other person to play role of victim. Be brave and face it with love.

Real love is naked and simple. That is why we said “i love you.” Not “but i don’t know what to do, give me time, time will show”.

When you love someone, do not hesitate. There is word “not now”, and next following words are “too late.”

Did you deal with third person in your relation?

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When we love, our desire is focused on one person. We don’t want to share this person with others, and that is why we don’t like competition. This is in human nature, to defeat, eliminate, even destroy every competitor or rival, because they stand on our way to happiness.

Before we exhume war cleaver, we must be aware that competition is not the main problem. If you have problem in relation, you can’t blame other people, because your partner is the one who is with you. You sleep, eat and share life with him or her, not with others, so if something went wrong, discuss that with owner of your heart.

Many women think wrong that problems will disappear if they get rid of their opponents. Yes, that Sheila bitch wanted to steal my husband, but if i kick her ass , we will be happy. Now you get rid of Sheila, Rebecca, Annie and all those trash, but your partner is still cheating you? If you saw movie “The other women” with Cameron Diaz and Leslie Mann, you will get the point about unfaithful partner. Such person don’t care for anyone, just for yourself.

What kind of competition can stand on way of our happiness in love?

Ex partner. That girlfriend or boyfriend are still here, maybe in our neighborhood, but you meet them and every time you see person, something stuck in your throat. Why they are still alive?

Best friends. Yes he told you that Mabel is his colleague from work, and that Nadine is his friend from high school, but you still don’t believe him, because he share messages with them , he drink coffee with them and you feel that they steal his attention from you.

Fictional person. Your partner maybe joke with you how he dream about perfect women, but every time you see example of his standards, you will feel as shit. That is matter of your self confidence.

What are the most stupid things you can do, when you afraid of rivalry?

Send sms or emails to your rival.

Call them.

Gossip them around.

Try to wait them in ambush and beat them.

Accuse them that they involve in your relation, even they have no idea about this.

Of course, sometimes you can have right, that someone really want to invade in your privacy. That woman really want to seduce your husband or that man wants to sleep with your girlfriend.

What will you do?

Talk with your partner and check the facts.

Deal with your partner together, how to stay away from that person.

Tell your partner that you feel unpleasant, that you are concerned. If he cares, he will stop negative emotions by his actions.

Relation is based on mutual feelings, harmony and agreement. When you two are together and your actions are mutual, nobody can stand on your way. This moment when something happens behind your back, something went wrong. This is alarm call. It is not invitation that you must kill other woman, this is moment when you need to talk with your partner. If he doesn’t care, this relation is dead.