How to face it with treason?

Face it with treason is hard kick in the ass. That moment when you realize that trustful person is traitor, someone in your life with whom you share trust, confidence and give part of yourself is indeed mole, discovery of treason is great shock. That Caesar and Brut story can’t leave us calm.

What is treason indeed and who are traitors? 

 

Indeed, traitor is selfish person. When someone is a snitch, spy or rat, that person is selfish. It is opposite of loyalty, because when you are loyal you are thinking about your friend, you don’t want to hurt him or her, you are careful and you have balance. But indeed treason is kind of weakness, and traitor is person with a price. Now you must only find out how much that person costs.

The worst kind of treason is in the area of friendship and love. This is a story about Alice and Victoria. They were inseparable. Two different girls, as two sides of the same mirror. Alice was shy and calm, and Victoria was hot tempered and hasty, but they completed each other. Alice had ability to make Victoria calm, and Victoria taught Alice how to fight for her aims. Until the day when Alice met womanizer Peter, it was great friendship. Peter was notorious guy , he had suspicious job and many women around. At first he wanted to seduce Victoria, but she rejected him. From that day Peter was thinking only how to revenge. He seduced Alice, she was sweet and kind and ideal for role of his wife. During marriage Peter used all possible ways to separate Alice from Victoria. All attempt failed because Alice was devoted to her friend. One day Peter said that he will take vacation from his busy work so Alice and him will travel together in some foreign country. Their marriage stuck in crises and Alice was crucified, because she always wanted to see Egypt, and now she had big chance.

There was only one condition – to break her friendship with Victoria forever. After long thinking, Alice has decided. She was silent as always, she just gone with her husband on trip without notified Victoria about that. She left her short message on her door “sorry, i love him and that is impossible to have you and him, so i decided to stay with my husband.” Victoria was shocked but she could not do anything. She was waiting, because she knew that it is not over yet. After journey, Peter asked for divorce, because their marriage failed. Not because of Victoria, it was because of his wish to control everything. Alice wanted to make peace with Victoria after that, but Victoria refused her. She never forgot her best friend’s treason , because she knew that she would do it again, as her loyalty never existed.

Life will give us situations when is time to choose.

It is hard to stand between two fires. For example, boss offers promotion to you, but condition is to break connection with your cooperator, to move in another city even this will separate you from your family. Traitor is person who will sacrifice others for own sake. It is just a mask that traitor doing something for community. Neither Mata Hari, double spy, did not do anything for the sake of community.

Traitor try to sit on two chairs without fall on the floor. 

So, if someone wants to hurt you over your friends, find out who is the weak spot in your team. Who is the rat? This is point in business world, steal ideas or people from rival company , but first find weak spot. Find a traitor who will fast change sides.

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How you deal with obstacles in your life?

When you have to deal with problems, usually you will get advice: “Be strong.” Our characters are different and we will handle our hard moments on different ways.

 

Someone will cry and breakdown is possible.

You pass through tough breakup or divorce? You will need hand, but the main decision is on you, how you will handle this situation. If you are strong person, you will not ring on the door of your friends every time when you feel sad and when your ex is missing you. Very important part is your pride. Face it with problems because they will not run away over night.

Life can be as earthquake, ground is shaking under your feet when bad things start to ruin your safety. Time of crises is an explosion. Bomb is here, your life will crush, you will collect small pieces , behind of you is sound of rattle and you are lost. Strong person will consider this situation as challenge. Well, life is testing me, so let me see how i can deal with this. I am fighter, so my odds are not big, but i am in the game. That moron left me and i will find better guy. In fact he do me a favor. I had no power to leave him, but i will be enough strong not to call him back.

If you are weak, you will think about suicide, because for you now is end of the world.
I will not love anyone as i loved him, he was everything to me and my life is over, so i will start to plan my funeral. This pathetic elegy is the main problem of weak people, they give up even they still have chance to fix things. We can see this difference in childhood. Little weak boy lose in monopoly game. He will cry, he is furious and next time he will not play, because he afraid of defeat. His friend is brave guy. He will also lose, but he can’t wait next time. This is adrenaline, challenge. He is very happy to get this kind of revenge. Now i will smash him and i will win, this is how he thinks.

 

When you got bad mark at school, will you give up from studying? Let’s leave school, all this is shit and i don’t want to bother anymore. Or, you will prove to teacher that you are not idiot. You are candidate for excellent mark next time.

 

Life is not fairy tale. If anyone thinks that life is just unwrapped gift, that person is very wrong. We can see in movies that some people can get anything because they are benefited, powerful or simply lucky. This is not realistic view. Behind every victory and happiness is a background. If you dig into other’s life, you will see pain, grief, struggle. Ask reach businessman how he gets success. His money doesn’t come from the sky right into his hands. It was hard battle, and way to success was full of thorns.

Darwin said: “Only the strongest survive.” The strongest people are not those who are over 100 kilograms weight . They are not wrestlers or kick boxers. Real strength came out from clear mind. You might beat everyone if you are resistant, if you don’t give up and if you believe in yourself. If someone thinks opposite, make a challenge. Real fighter will respond on your challenge. Coward will hide in the rat hole and eventually, he will gossip you behind your back.

Who is your friend with benefits?

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You are hungry for passion and you are not in relation? Relation is indeed obligation and it takes lot of attempts to find right partner. Sometimes we can be so busy that we have no time to focus on special person in our life, to reply on every SMS and every phone call, to support that person in the case of troubles or problems.

If we are not ready for relation, we must be honest. Here is an option if you don’t want to be alone but also if you don’t want to be bonded with someone. This solution is friend with benefit.

Samantha was excellent student, she was running for future career and education was her dream. She wanted to become successful lawyer. All her relations broke because she was so busy with exams, seminars and also she was working in library during her free time. Her partners felt that they are  unnecessary things and all gone from her life. This stressful life make her frustrated because she needed sex. She didn’t want to be promiscuous because of her reputation. So she had deal with her best friend Frank. From time to time, they had dates with sex. Frank was single, also not ready for obligations and he liked Samantha so they had casual sex once at week. But then Frank found girlfriend and Samantha became jealous. He was cheating his regular girlfriend with Samantha and that relation broke. Frank and Samantha involved feelings and they became real couple. This story had happy ending.

 

Melissa had no such luck. Her friend Ronald used her for sex, but she hoped it will be different. She realized after one year that it will never change, because Melissa was only sexual toy for Ronald. He was nice with other girls, but he did not know when Melissa has birthday, what is her’s sister name and so many things important to respect person. She took him benefits and broke that connection, with tears.

What is important if you decide to have friend with benefit?

check out is that person single

– accept that is deal only for sex

– don’t be jealous on his or her private life, your meetings are just for sex

– you can get out from that “relation” anytime, without explanation

– don’t judge or blame your friend with benefit, it was deal from the start

If you are not stable person, if you live in dreams or it is easy to deceive you, this kind of relation is not for you. This is game of nerves and your feelings must shut down. Even if that “relation” become something serious, it will not be with force or because you beg for real love. It will be spontaneous.

 

Think about that person, how much benefits he or she deserve , because you are master of your body. Also be sure that person knows to keep a secret, because some people are corny and traditional. Maybe your future partner could not accept that you had friend with benefit. Let it be your sweet secret.

10 ways how to test your trust in people

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It is very easy to get fooled. Someone cheated you, you are misguided? Don’t blame yourself, it could happen to everyone. Difference is in way, how to get out from this and avoid future disappointments.

Naivete is sign of trust, just in extreme form. If you believe in everything, you are naive.

Life would be boring without risks. If you are too cautious, you step into paranoid area. Wow, everyone is against me, i am on black list and for sure this is again my bad luck. On that way, you close yourself into golden cage, and nobody could harm you. How to open your soul to others? Who can make guarantee that you will find treasure, and that you will not stuck in the trap?

Here are the most often traps for naive people, and you are not the only one who will fail. 

1. salesman and his skills 

You bought something what is not necessary and you spent big money, because salesman persuaded you in value of his products? Look at your wardrobe, there are dresses you will never wear. Here is jewelry without values, fake pearls and cheap necklace, but it looks good on first sight.

2. big chance for easy money

Many advertising about earning big money on easy ways fooled many people. Everyone will think “but i will be the one who will really earn.”

3. masters of tarot, black magic, love spells

This woman saw that you will get marry next year? You are still single but you gave her 100 euro? You are not first and not the last.

4. virtual marriage proposal

Your prince charming promised you to get marry and then he disappeared after you lend him money? Call someone who have similar experience.

5. big lottery won, roulette, slot machines

Las Vegas, Monte Carlo, expensive casinos over the world, and everyone dream about jackpot. You think you are the one who will win? But others think about this too.

6. meeting with agent who promised you to make star from you

You want to be famous and this man promised you this? Suddenly you are victim of human trafficking, porno industry or you simply got fooled. You enter into twilight zone.

7. online shopping

Cruel stats and numbers are black evidence, how many people get fooled with online shopping. Empty pockets and wallets are reality.

8. liberty movements, sects

You wish to escape from reality, and spiritual person promised you better world? Suddenly, you are without passport and money, but you are member of sect and they can do with you whatever they want.

9. politicians promises

You are member of political group and they promised you good job, when they win on elections. Nothing for you, still? Keep searching.

10. pills for losing weight

You paid big money to lose your weight, but you are even more fat than before? At least, your wallet is thin.

Everyone who wants success in life must develop sense for reality.

It doesn’t mean that you need to give up from dreams and hopes, but you need info. Numbers don’t lie. If 90% people slip in some area, will you enter into 10% who did not? Maybe your neighbor won on the lottery, but it doesn’t mean that you are next. Your cousin got married for rich man after they know each other 2 months? She got luck, but exceptions doesn’t make rules.

Big decisions are investments. First you need to study your situations, otherwise you will buy cat in the bag. There is no guarantee that you will protect yourself from bad surprises, but at least don’t jump on first offer. Also, if you did mistake, your knowledge will help you to get out faster from this. If you see cat in the bag, throw this bag and runaway.

Did you stuck in ghost relation?

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After breakup, relation is dead. It doesn’t mean that feelings are dead. The same is with rejections. Just because someone rejected you, it doesn’t mean that you stop immediately your feelings for this person. In both cases, this is ghost relation. We are bonded by our addiction, sadness, broken ego, and it can’t have nothing with love.

Let’s suppose that you are loving person. You had success with many guys , you are picky and it gives you big choice. One day someone said no. How is possible, everyone loves you, and he said no?  You keep following him, because he is the only you want.

Ghost relation is connection between subject and object. Subject is person who loves someone who said no, object is a target. This object can’t express love, so relation is one sided.  Now, you will say, very simple, object will walk away and this is end. Sometimes, person gives fake hopes.

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When person accepts ghost relation?

There is nobody better in the moment. Why not to enjoy in company of someone who is crazy for you?

He feel pity. “I don’t want to hurt her. ” “We can be friends, i can’t make her cry. “

Loneliness. ” I don’t love her but i don’t want to feel alone.

Ghost relation is unfair game. You accept, but you can’t give anything for return. Let’s assume that you will marry for someone because of interest. This is your speech : “I will make love with you but i don’t want to kiss you. I can’t love you. ” Remember scene from “Casino” when Sharon Stone gets marry for Robert de Niro even she doesn’t love him. She runs in arms of her real love, later.

If you are object of ghost relation, it would be fair to say clear what you feel. Don’t wait time , it will be worse. Don’t wait perfect moment, it will never happen. If your excuses are his parents, his friends or business agreement, if you work together and he feels more for you, don’t hesitate to say what you really feel.

A woman scorned is dangerous woman. Once when woman realize that you stole her time by misleading her, she will seek revenge. I remember my friend who slept with guy , the one who did not love her. Few evenings later, she saw him with other girl. She comes in night club, took glass of juice and spill it over his face, in front of his girlfriend. It was unpleasant situation, but he deserved.

Ghost relation is act of selfishness, but from both sides. You know he doesn’t love you, what you are doing with him? You know you doesn’t love him, so you are still there?

Painful truth is stroke of real love which hits owner of your heart. Suddenly, he falls in love and he gave to other woman all what you never got. Now you see he is able for love, but not with you.

Female rivalry

It is great to have friend and share all secrets, troubles and joy with this person. Such friend is indeed right hand and you will never feel alone. If you are lucky to have few friends of the same gender, you got the most wonderful treasure.

Female friendships are really fragile gifts, as crystal glasses. Be careful how to hold that glass. If you hold too tight, glass will break. If you don’t hold careful, glass will slip out from your hands. And you can cut on that pieces.

How to recognize real from fake friend? Who is lady friend, and who is wolf friend, ready to tear you?

 

Some signs of a lady:

 

– she will ask you first how are you, and what is new, and then talk about herself

– she will help you when you have problems, without excuses, if she is busy she will help you when she will be available

– there is no guy who can stand between real female friends

– she will not date with your ex, with guy who is in your heart even if that guy doesn’t want you, also she will not associate with people who hurt you

– she will be happy for your success in work and in love, and she will not compete with you

When is clear that your best friend is wolf?

she talks only about herself, about guys who are stalking her, about her new shoes, and people who are envious to her

– she is with you all the time when you are in company with handsome guys, she wants to capture their attention

– she will date with your ex without telling you, she will try to seduce even your boyfriend

– she will be busy every time you need her, she has much more important things in her life

– she will be jealous and envious if your life is more successful and happier than hers

Friend wolf is indeed rival. It is better to have open enemy, than rival friend. She wants all what you have, even more. She is not here to make your life easier, she will make your life bitter. Because, she thinks that she is better, and she needs audience and slaves, not friends.

So take a look on your friends, do you see wolves between them?

How to get a girl?

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Love doesn’t come by force. The main mistake which inexperienced guy can do is to push or force girl to date with him. That kind of guys are or bad mannered or violent and every girl will escape from them.

When you like someone, imagine would you be happy to be with that person without her acceptance. This is the same as you hold parrot in the cage and she wants to fly out, but you don’t want to let her go. Love is a choice, not a prison.

Some men forgot that women have choice. In old times women had card to pick their partners for dance. Ladies were choosing accord their wishes. 

I can understand man wish to catch beautiful girl, but wrong approach is to be persistent and to annoy her when she doesn’t want to.

Megan was beautiful girl and very popular in the school. Roy was crazy for her, but she did not notice him. One day he gathered his 5 friends to support him in attempt to ask her for a date. When Megan saw group of guys in front of her classroom, she was very frightened. One of Roy’s friends approached to her and started to talk about Roy and his qualities, how he is good guy and how she will not find better nowhere. She simply runaway because it was trap for her. Nobody asked her what she wants. 

Some guys feel as losers and they compare themselves with their friends who are successful in dating.

Why some guys are chosen and popular, and why others are intruders and losers?

Popular guys have some characteristic:

They are unavailable from time to time.

They are busy with other things and they don’t ask for girl 24 hours.

They will not annoy girl with desires on first sight, they will talk with her first about other things.

They will give space to her to express her wishes.

They will respect her choice.

Also they will wait until she is ready for any decision about relation.



How you will recognize pest ?


He calls you “my best girl” even you did not say even hello to him.

Once you said no and he is again near you, repeating the same question when you will go on date with him.

His jokes are old fashioned and only he laughs at this. 

He got rejection from other women too.

He can be violent or use threats. (“If you don’t want to date with me, i will tell everyone that you are slut.”)

You can get his request for virtual friendship even you don’t have common friends with him, his profile is empty and about me is hidden.

Some men forgot simple thing, that women are not toys. You can’t treat woman as your property, she is not a car to drive her when you want and how fast you want. 

Indeed love is a lottery, and if you are not good player you will be alone because you chose bad strategy.