Why women at work compete with each other?

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When someone talks about discrimination between genders at workplace, many will pull trigger on men, who are bosses with bigger salaries, who are there to seduce innocent women or to abuse power on any other way. In shadow of this topic is relation women versus women.

Women are territorial as cats. Once when woman settle down on higher position at work , she is without mercy toward other who had no equal luck.

Women at work are separated on next categories:

Married. Respectable members of society, especially if they have at least two kids.

Divorced. Less respectable, but still in the game. Once she had someone, and if he left her with kids, she is worthy of condolence. 

In cohabitation. Women who live with men, but without legal paper. They are not so favorite, because marriage without ring and paper is not valuable.

Single. The worst category for workplace. You will be on target for all men, accord women gossips. Old, horny, ugly, even married when they wish to have fun. If someone has affair, you are on the line.

As much women are talking how men are cruel as bosses, they don’t see what they do to each other. Imagine young, beautiful girl who started to work , and her older roommates, not so young and beautiful, in the same office. There will be jealousy and envy, and soon she will get label as slutty girl or someone who steal other husbands. Her work skills will be underestimated, and if she will progress, all women will say that she did it through bed.

Women at work are very feisty when they talk about their privacy. If they are single, they will defend their status as the most desirable. If they are married, they will judge everyone who is not in marriage. If they are just engaged, they will also say that is the best time of their life.

Look at how Adele , single woman, talked with Andrea, woman in marriage, without kids.

“Well, at least i have weekend for myself. I don’t need to wash dirty socks and panties, and i don’t need to check is my husband hungry. I go to party. “

Your private status is your label. Once when you are employed, this status is part of your definition.
Sometimes, it will have influence on your professional tasks or you will have problems with vacation. When boss said to Mya that she needs to work overtime on holiday, she said : “But why me? I have three kids.” And boss replied to her: “Your kids are adults. If i say this to someone single, she will also complaint .”

Benefits related with status are also part of your privacy. Some women will use own family to get promotion, as for example : ” I need bigger salary because i am mother with two kids, i am single mother and so on. ” We all need money, but some circumstances will be our advantage. What about pregnancy? When Sheila went back at work after 2 years, she was promoted by default, even there were more candidates for her position. Simply, as mother, she got benefits which other woman could not have.

Sometimes, status will change. Woman will marry or have kids. Woman will get divorce. If this changes are unexpected, if woman is already in certain ages, this is perfect for gossips. Jasmine gave birth in forties, and women laughed that she hired man to get her pregnant.

Word discrimination is used so easily when man try to make joke at work with women, accord her abilities or her good looking.

But, when women start to sabotage each other, this is other piece of cake. You are victim of chicken fight. Instead of horny male boss, your rival is frustrated female who wait to tear you, because you are younger, smarter or more attractive. Simply, you have something what she can’t have and now you will pay for this.

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How is it feel when love is platonic?

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“I love him as best friend and brother. We understand each other as twins. He touched my spirit. But, i have no desires toward him.
This is definition of platonic love, relation about two persons based on friendship, without passion. When people make excuses why to stay together in relation which is not hot, they talk about platonic love. They will talk about stars which lose light with years. They will talk about common bills instead of kiss. Also, they will see family and relatives every time when they wish to make love. This kind of love should be free of every spontaneous reaction, anger, jealousy or rage. Platonic couple is connected with blood relation, and there is no jealousy because they have mutual roots.
I could mention many couples who fit into definition of platonic love. So, some of my female friends talked about this feeling, even they have no clue that is platonic.
” I don’t know am i fall in love or just loved by him. I mean, my ex, we were so hot, but my husband gives me safety. “
 
” We are not hot kids anymore. But we will grow old together. “
” Sex doesn’t matters anymore. We trust each other “
 
Platonic love is relation with weakness. There is always danger, when one person is more hungry for passion. Imagine Jean and Gavin. She was wild girl, and he was cool, flegmatic guy. Jean had power to excite Gavin, and he had power to make Jean calm. Butterflies were not around them after few years, but pure love was there. One day Jean fall in love in Marco, guy from internet. They connected through social network, in chat. First, she hated him because he was arrogant and rude, with ironic sense for jokes, he was mocking her on first sight. Later, they were fighting as warriors. How she could not stand him! Suddenly, they kissed and revealed new part of themselves. They wrote thousand hot messages, Jean explode as bomb. She was dry wood , and Marco made big flame, just with few steps. In the moment, Jean is flying between her marriage and virtual affair.
When two people share platonic love, they should be honest.
Some promises are necessary.
I can’t stay with you forever.
 
If you want to let go, i will agree. I don’t hold you.
 
If i sleep with someone, i take this piece which i miss. 
 
I am sure we will talk and deal about everything. We don’t bring quick decisions, we are reasonable duo. 
 
We care for each other health, we worry about each other but we have control. We will not make love in beach as crazy couple.
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Platonic love is flower without smell, or this smell disappeared with time. If you want to be spared of pain , platonic love is ideal for you because all is clear at beginning. Once when you start to accept things with heart, you will get out from platonic zone.

Some positive thoughts for my followers

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I wish to all my followers happy Friday.

Here I share some of my positive, inspirational thoughts which helps me in hard moments:

If you wish to survive, you will not afraid of challenge.

The biggest risk is to do nothing.

Don’t call past, there is nothing new to hear.

People who criticize you are kind of injections. Take this needle as motivation for your progress.

Don’t underestimate yourself, that is not your job. Others will try to sabotage you anyway.

Haters are just your followers from other side of mirror.

Never lose your sense for humor. Jokes might help you to survive the day.

 

For the end, this is me. My virtual friend spelled my name wrong, I am Kristina. He made this photo as sign of friendship, but he forgot to  spell it right.

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7 signs that breakup is near

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Once when woman caught man of her dreams she will focus how to keep him. That is not easy task, because as much is hard to find soulmate, it is even harder to save this relation forever. Butterflies in stomach are here for 2 or 3 years, and then situation is changing. Our relation is ready for next chapter, so love will be deeper and more mature or we will lost interest. What connected us together at the start of this relation is not so important anymore. If we don’t grow together with time, simply this love will get lost. You loved this man because he was so passionate and wild in sex, but if his sexual skills are everything he could offer to you, sparks will fade and you will look into lazy guy who is unable to understand you.

There are some signs that relation will break. 


Which kind of atmosphere is intro in breakup? When we will know what is not meant to be?

Battlefield in relation. Conflicts from time to time are healthy for relation, but if you fight with your partner day by day and if your every conversation ends with ugly words, this is not sign of love. You and partner are holding a rope, and everyone drag on their side. This will be very tense and too much conflicts will lead into breakup.

Too much secrets. You live with this guy but he is mystery to you? What kind of job he works, why he never talk about his father and where he disappears from time to time? If you can’t trust to your partner, you live with stranger. Who knows, maybe he has another family somewhere. 

Too much freedom. Everyone has right on own space in relation, but person in marriage or in serious relation can’t be equal to single person. If you do what you wish without asking opinion of your second half, you are not devoted. This relation is burden to you, and your partner live is constantly fear that one day you will go to buy cigarettes and that you will not come back. Probably it will be like that.

Lack of respect. There is no love without respect. You can have great sex with person who doesn’t give you respect, but this is far from love. If your partner did not introduce you to his family or friends, if he is dating with other women behind your back, he is disrespectful.

Despair. There is no relation which will have success if you beg or force partner to stay with you. You can’t blackmail partner with children , suicide or tears. Some women will say “i will forgive infidelity because he is always coming back. ” There are some women who will even pimp another women to his man, in hope that he will never leave them if they allow such freedom in marriage. That is pathetic and worthy of condolence. 

Silence and closed mouth. Some marriages are based on secret pledge. Man is master of the house, and woman will shut up her mouth. He gives order, she is here to listen and do accord his wishes. During years, women will suffer more and more and one day she can decide to leave this community where is no freedom of speech.

Abusing. In this world is much abused women, but not every of them will complain or try to get out from this situation. This is not rare that woman will talk about how she is clumsy that she falls and hit herself at the door. Black eye and broken mouth are sign that you need to leave. You are in danger, not only your self respect, you can be in life danger too.

Love relation is house, based on safe material. If you built your love with trust, honesty, mutual respect and patience, this result will show up as crown with years. But if you deceive yourself with lies, promises and expectations without any good reason behind that, you are actor in own delusional theater. This is circus, and you are clown. At the end, when your relation is over, this is not surprise. This crowded house exploded in the air. This booby trap is activated a long time ago, just you were blind to see that.

Makeup sex

15095077_1358561900823096_3544870188036048831_nThey were arguing whole day, and they could not make agreement. She was stubborn, and he was macho type, who believed that man should be boss. Suddenly he kissed her, she fall in his arms  and they made love whole night. In the morning they start to argue again, about the same things.
So called makeup sex is one of ways how to solve problems with your partner. When two different characters fall in love, their relation will often look as battlefield. Especially if that differences are expressed in important areas of life, couple will make many efforts to create harmony. Here is the question, what will win in the end, their love or ego?
Sean and Paula met each other in the shopping mall. They were in crowd and Sean had problem with credit card, so he caused big line at the pay desk. Everyone was furious, and Paula send him to hell. He invited her in coffee bar as sign of an apology and their relation started at this way. Soon they realized that they are as dog and cat. Paula was liberal woman, and Sean was traditional and conservative. He complaint even about her clothes, that she should change her style, because her skirts were too short and accord him, she was seducing men on such way. Also he never wanted to admit his mistakes, and many times Paula apologized to him, even he was wrong one.
Paula had weak spot, she adored sex with Sean. When they made love, all differences were vanished, their bodies made understanding so clear. It was not important who is right, and who is wrong. Paul erased all conflicts with his kisses and Paula was blind on his failures. One day, Paula found track of lipstick on his shirt and it woke up her doubts. When he was showering, she checked his cell phone. There were bunch of romantic messages. She was quiet, but next time when Paul started to complain about something, she was cold toward him. She even rejected sex. Then she got the point how makeup sex was temporary solution, because problems were still here. She caught moment to sit and talk with Paul, and he accepted. They made progress by talking and in the moment their relation is on transit zone, because Paul realized that he did something bad.
You can see in romantic movies how man will rip clothes and push his beloved woman on the bed, as in “9 and half week” or “Basic instinct”. Later, that passion will not solve problems, they will still be in stand by position.
Women are especially sensitive after sex, so they will made some questions.
How could he insult me after sex?
 
How could he call her after sex with me?
 
Sheets are still warm from our passionable night, and he went without explanation.
 
How it doesn’t work out? I thought, after that night, everything will be allright.
 
Men will think different, because sex is field of their power. If you can’t win woman with words, take her into bed and show her who is the boss. They will separate love from sex and if they don’t love women who are their sex mates, it will be tough.
Makeup sex is not good way to solve problems with your boyfriend or husband. That is good intro, but never solution.
If you don’t have mind connection and understanding with your darling, even kama sutra will not help you .

Skeletons in the closet

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If you constantly live in past, you can’t focus at present and you don’t see the future.  I learnt to separate my present moments from past. Skeletons in the closet my stay there, cause every exhumation will make them smell more.

How i look at people who constantly live in past?

They can’t forgive mistakes.

They are not progressing.

They lost battle with time, cause everything was better for them, in “that time. “

They rarely give chance to new friends, new things and new love .

Living in past make us to regret, to remember or to be nostalgic. Imagine that you drive car, and you don’t drive forward. You drive back on the road you already passed. How you can expect change if you are constantly on the same road?

One of my qualities are forgiveness and tolerance. Yes, i give chance because i believe everyone makes mistakes and people can change in some circumstances. I am not rigid, so i don’t care if someone was hooligan, cheater, playboy, player or similar. Wounded people often have big heart and bunch of emotions, at difference from people who lived under golden cage with golden spoon in their ass.

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What kind of people judge others by their past?

People who live in comfort zone. No risk, no damage.

People who don’t like changes . 

People who aware to  make any cuts.

Sometimes i had ritual to make farewell with past. I burn old diaries, old notebook and old clothes. Gifts i got from ex partners and ex friends i thrown into garbage. If there is nothing left, i go forward. I don’t hate and i don’t turn around. I want to live free , that is why i can’t look at this skeletons.

People who live in past talk on this way : “Yes, i will never forget what he did. It was very sad , i remember as it happened yesterday. I still can’t look her into eyes. I remind myself every day that she doesn’t deserve to forgive her. I will remember this till the end of my life. “

Why is that bitterness when you have so much things in present to be joyful? Living in past is life on graveyard. All is still here, but nothing new.

Forbidden love with spouse

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Many articles talk about women who fall in love in married men. They are considered as victims, delusional or marriage breakers. Words are not saved, so slut, whore or bitch is not rare name for mistresses.

What happens when situation is an opposite? When single man falls in love in married women, how society look at this? Famous Richard Branson waited one year that his present wife divorce from her former husband. He loved married woman.

What kind of men can fall in love in married woman and got involved with her?

Men who had no luck in love. His partners are always wrong, and he is already so disappointed that he gave up from love.

Playboys. He ask perfect opportunity for relation without obligation, and married woman can’t commit to him cause he is already obligated to her husband.

Teenagers and young man in twenties. Their fantasies in bed starts with married teachers, neighbors or his friend’s mother.

Man with Peter Pan syndrome. He is afraid to commit and married woman is ideal for this.

Men in midlife crises. He is already divorced or he never got married, but he needs warm body next to him.

Now, this kind of affair has some rules, and if mad husband will not catch you , you need to stick to some rules:

As married man, spouse will not divorce in mostly cases. She needs refreshment, not commitment.

Husband is in first plan, so forget about spending holidays and vacation with her. 

Don’t make her feel guilty. You knew she is married so you have no power as her husband.

Don’t be jealous. She will sleep with her husband too, at least she is a wife.

Expect messages and calls in unpredictable time. She can’t know when she is free. 

In such situation, society will pity for man who got involved with spouse, and judge her who is cheater and marriage breaker. In situation where man is cheater, society will judge his mistress. In both situations, women are in worse positions, because mistress is a slut as cheating wife is a slut.

I wish to say, man can also found out himself in difficult situation. What started as sex can finish as broken heart. Man’s heart is also not from stone, he can really fall in love in spouse who is already taken. Then, what’s next? Do you want this woman because she is forbidden or you really want to steal her to be your wife?

In some situation fooled women fails and chose donkey instead of horse. She got divorce, but her lover is not interested for her anymore. It was great until here was drama and forbidden space. Now, when here are dishes and bills, all is routine, too much obligations and this is not funny anymore.

That happens with affairs, you never know when it could be worse. If you cut of affair and your husband still doesn’t know anything, you are saved. If you continue this road to hell, you can expect everything. Two or three broken hearts or another marriage? Time will show until you still have it enough guts to wait.